World Naval Ships Forums  
VIEW ALL OF OUR CURRENT SPECIAL OFFERS HERE!

Go Back   World Naval Ships Forums > Naval History > Other Naval Topics
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Other Naval Topics Other general naval or navy-related topics.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 13-09-2009, 12:58
siggy63's Avatar
siggy63 siggy63 is offline
Lieutenant-Commander
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: North Kent
Posts: 345
Default Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

It is with regret and haste that I write this letter to you, regret that such a small misunderstanding would lead to the following circumstances, and haste that you may get this report before you form your own pre-conceived opinions from reports in the world press, for I’m sure they will tend to over dramatise the affair.

We had just picked up the pilot, and the cadet had returned from changing the ‘G’ flag for the ‘H’, and being his first trip was having difficulty in rolling up the ‘G’ flag. I therefore proceeded to show him how. Coming to the last part I told him to ’Let Go’. The lad although willing is not too bright, necessitating my having to repeat the order in a sharper tone.

At this moment the Chief Officer appeared from the chart-room, having been plotting the ships position and thinking that it was the anchors that were being referred to repeated the ‘Let Go’ to the Third Officer on the Forecastle. The port anchor having been cleared away but not ‘Walked out’ was promptly let go. The effect of letting the anchor drop from the ‘Pipe’ whilst the vessel has proceeding at full harbour speed proved too much for the windlass brake, and the entire length of the port cable was pulled out by the roots I fear that the damage to the chain locker may be extensive. The braking effect of the port anchor naturally caused the vessel to shear in that direction, right towards the swing bridge that spans a tributary to the river up which we were proceeding.

The swing bridge operator showed great presence of mind by opening the bridge for my vessel. Unfortunately he did not think to stop the vehicular traffic, the result being that the bridge partly opened and deposited a Volkswagen, two cyclists and a cattle truck on the forelock. My ships company is at present rounding up the content of the latter, which from the noise I would say were pigs. In his efforts to arrest the progress of the vessel, the Third Officer dropped the starboard anchor, too late to be of any practical use, for it fell on the swing bridge operators control cabin.

After the port anchor was let go and the vessel started to shear I gave a double ring full astern on the engine telegraph and personally rang the engine room to order maximum astern revolutions. I was informed that the sea temperature was 53 degrees and asked if there was a film tonight. My reply would not add constructively to this report.

Up to now I have confined my report to the activities at the forward end of the vessel. Down aft they were having their own problems.

At the moment the port anchor was let go the Second Officer was supervising the making fast of the after tug and was lowering the ships spring down onto her deck.

The sudden braking effect of the port anchor caused the tug to run under the stern of my vessel, just at the moment when the propeller was answering my double ring ‘Full Astern’. The prompt action of the Second Officer in securing the inboard end of the towing spring delayed the sinking of the tug by some minutes, therefore allowing the safe abandonment of that vessel.

It is strange, but at the very same moment of letting go the port anchor there was a power cut ashore. The fact that we were passing over a ‘Cable Area’ at the time might suggest that we might have touched something on the riverbed. It was perhaps lucky that the high-tension cables brought down by the foremast were not live but owing to the blackout it is impossible to say where the pylon fell.

It never fails to amaze me, the action and behaviour of foreigners during moments of minor crisis. The pilot, for instance is at this moment huddled in the corner of my cabin, alternatively crooning to himself and crying, after having consumed a bottle of gin in a time that is worthy of inclusion in the Guinness book of Records. The tug Captain, on the other hand reacted violently and had to be forcibly restrained by the Steward, who has him handcuffed in the ships hospital, where he is telling me to do impossible things with my ship and crew.

I enclose the names of addresses of drivers and insurance companies of the vehicles on my foredeck, which the Third Officer collected after his somewhat hurried evacuation of the forecastle. These particulars will enable you to claim for the damage they did to the railings on number one hold.

I am closing this preliminary report for I am finding it difficult to concentrate with the sounds of police sirens and their flashing lights.

It is sad to think that had the cadet realised that there is no need to fly pilot flags after dark none of this would have happened.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 13-09-2009, 13:02
siggy63's Avatar
siggy63 siggy63 is offline
Lieutenant-Commander
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: North Kent
Posts: 345
Default Re: Naval Humour -I Name This Ship

I NAME THIS SHIP........ Research, even into the most mundane subject, can sometimes bring unexpected rewards. Recently, for reasons too dull to explain, I was attempting to discover the names of battleships which served with the Royal Navy during the Second World War. The reference librarian hopefully provided me with a huge volume which listed the names of every British warship ever built, and as I leafed through the index, I was impressed by the quality of the names that the British have given their warships.

HMS Relentless, HMS Repulse, HMS Resolution; fine names, names to gladden the heart of every true Brit and dismay any foreigners with a grasp of English. Names redolent of courage and firm-jawed determination - HMS Sceptre, HMS Scimitar, HMS Seadog, HMS Spanker -

HMS Spanker ? it had to be a misprint, but when I looked at the relative page there it was, HMS Spanker, minesweeper. I turned back to the index and soon discovered that HMS Spanker was not the only warship to bear a silly name. A quick check unearthed the destroyers HMS Fairy and HMS Frolic, the light cruiser, HMS Sappho and the corvette, HMS Pansy.

My first assumption was that these names had been chosen by some fresh faced innocent unaware of their connotations, but a careful reading of the index suggested that the choice of such names was deliberate and malicious. I have no proof for my theory, but I strongly suspect that they were the creations of an embittered clerk.

He was a minor bureaucrat who had once dreamed of becoming a naval hero, a second Nelson or Benbow, but had been turned down for active service on the grounds of flat feet and myopia. The Sea Lords, kindly and foolishly, gave him an office job in the Admiralty. There, as he brooded upon the shattering of his ambitions, his envy of the jolly Jack Tars serving in His Majesty's ships turned to hatred and then into a desire to humiliate those who lived a life on the ocean wave. His big break came when he got a job in the Ship's Names Department and he set to work with a will.

Having started with HMS Pansy, HMS Fairy and HMS Spanker, he moved into sexually suggestive names - HMS Teaser, HMS Tickler, HMS Torrid, HMS Thruster and HMS Thrasher. Not content with the damage to morale that these names must have caused to morale that these names must have caused he followed up with HMS Inconstant, HMS Insolent, HMS Truant, HMS Dwarf and HMS Doris.

The man must have been twisted, but he was no mean amateur psychologist. Would an hard pressed admiral be cheered by the news that HMS Doris and HMS Dwarf (a cruiser and gunboat combination that sounds like an avant-garde cabaret act) were steaming to his aid ? Could he be certain that HMS Truant would turn up ? That HMS Inconstant wouldn't change sides, or that HMS Insolent wouldn't reply to his signals with a stream of abuse ?

This evil minded functionary worked hard to destroy fighting spirit, carefully calculating the result of call a ship HMS Hazard. The cry, "Hazard to port !" must have disrupted countless naval exercises and I strongly suspect that he tried to name a destroyer HMS Mutiny, thinking of the chaos that would result from the signal "Mutiny in Portsmouth". Someone spotted this and changed his proposed name from the English Mutiny to the French Mutinè, hoping that the ship would stir up trouble on courtesy visits to French ports.

If my theory is correct, that someone was Clerk No.2 he worked in the same office as Clerk No.1, but his history and beliefs were very different. He had been invalided out of the Navy after a distinguished career and was a ferocious xenophobe who believed that the British had the right to intimidate and bully anyone who stood in their way. his existence is demonstrated by further study of the list of names.

Most people would consider names like HMS Conqueror, HMS Terror and HMS Vengeance adequate for the purpose of frightening Britain's enemies. Not Clerk No.2 he though them namby-pamby and decided to rectify the situation. He wasn't as prolific as Clerk No.1, but he did his best christening such vessels as HMS Arrogant, HMS Imperialist, HMS Savage, HMS Spiteful, HMS Surly and HMS Tyrant. His finest hour came when he got the job of thinking up names beginning with V, he came up with HMS Vandal, HMS Venomous, HMS Vindictive and HMS Violent. He too was a good psychologist - nobody who had dared to challenge Britain could fail to be moved by the news that HMS Spiteful, HMS Violent and HMS Vindictive were turning up to sort them out.

In later years, as he sat writing letters to the Eastbourne Gazette demanding the introduction of public flogging for litter louts, he must have regretted not calling a ship HMS Vicious. However, he probably consoled himself with the thought that Clerk No.1 didn't get much of a look in on the V's. He would have christened the ships Vacuous, Vile, Verminous and Venereal. As it was he only managed HMS Vanity, which was presumably a sister ship of HMS Narcissus. Though Clerk No.2 no doubt deplored the behaviour of his colleague, he, too, allowed the problems of day-to-day existence to intrude into his work, though only after rows with his wife, hence HMS Termagant, HMS Virago and HMS Tirade.

I don't know for how many years they worked in the same office, but it must have been a fraught relationship. Each probably spent most of his time trying to trump the names of the other. Clerk No.1 christened HMS Pansy, No.2 responded with HMS Manly. No.1 - HMS Fairy, No.2 - HMS Virle. And so it went on until they retired and the ships they had named were either sunk or scrapped.

Now our ships have boringly correct names, which is a pity, for names could make a difference. A truly chauvinistic government would do well to study the names dreamed up by Clerk No.2. If we can no longer terrify opponents with the size of our navy, we could try to frighten them with aggressive nomenclature. A good start would be to retrieve the name HMS Violent and call sister ships HMS Psychopathic, HMS Blood Crazed and HMS Criminally Insane. The Vandal class could include HMS Ram Raider, HMS Headcase and HMS Terminator.

Of course, a more progressive government might go for names which reflected the concerns of the Left - HMS Black Sections, HMS Stop Clause 28, HMS Unilateralist and HMS Binding Decision of the Party Conference. Perhaps not, the Daily Mail would have a field day if HMS Unilateralist was ever sunk.

In any event, the name of the ship doesn't appear to have affected its ability to fight, HMS Truant sank the Karlsruhe, HMS Wallflower and HMS Inconstant accounted for several U-boats and I've do doubt that other ships with ridiculous names had excellent war records.

But it is hard not to imagine the crew of HMS Narcissus leaning over the side to admire their reflections in the water, or the crew of HMS Spanker being accosted by leather-clad masochists in dockside bars.

The crews of such ships must have been relieved when security considerations temporarily ended the practice of having the ship's name emblazoned on the cap-band. Even so, the change didn't come quickly enough for the unfortunate University Naval Reserve Unit which, when the orders for mobilisation came, was sent en masse to join a battleship. As they walked up the gangway the regulars on deck burst into hysterical laughter. The full name of the unit was the Cambridge University Naval Training Squadron, which was, of course indicated by the initials on their caps..........

Then again, it might be apocryphal.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 13-09-2009, 13:35
Batstiger's Avatar
Batstiger Batstiger is offline
Admiral
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: I now live in Telford having moved into Shropshire in 1964.
Posts: 2,661
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

Brilliant Siggy, Brilliant.

Bob.
__________________
HMS Tiger Venice 1960.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 13-09-2009, 13:40
siggy63's Avatar
siggy63 siggy63 is offline
Lieutenant-Commander
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: North Kent
Posts: 345
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report - RN Version

It is with both regret and haste that I despatch this communication to your Lordships. Regret that such a simple misunderstanding could have led to the ensuing sequence of events; and haste in order that you may hear my version which will no doubt appear in the international press. I am sure they will tend to overdramatise things somewhat.

At 21:00, we were proceeding into Hong Kong’s Aberdeen Harbour on a goodwill, informal visit. Tugs were in attendance, fore and aft, and the Harbour Pilot had been embarked. The ship’s air wing was arrayed on the flight deck and the band of the Royal Marines was playing appropriate music from the ski-jump.


We had left our escort HMS Brilliant, some 15 miles out where she was conducting an ASW exercise prior to following us in. The Officer of the Watch (OOW) was the Navigating Officer, assisted by the N2, so I, as a long course Communications Officer, took the new Midshipman aside to instruct him in the flying of harbour pennants. He had lowered the blue pennant and raised the orange one without any difficulty – however, he was experiencing some degree of difficulty with folding the blue. I decided to assist him with the task, and when it came to the final fold, I instructed him to “let go”. The lad proved to be a little slow, making it necessary for me to repeat the instruction in a somewhat firmer fashion. Unfortunately the Executive Officer, having just entered the bridge, overheard the instruction, and believing it to be an order addressed to himself, responded by ordering the letting go of the starboard anchor. The effect of letting go this anchor, while the ship was proceeding at 10 kts caused the ship to veer smartly in that direction – towards a minor tributary which empties into the harbour.

Unfortunately, the area was tightly packed with moored houseboats and fishing junks, but miraculously only 5 or 6 of these were sunk by our passage through them. It is fortunate indeed that these vessels were of wooden construction; in consequence of this, the shortening of our bow at the waterline can be measured in inches rather than feet.

The swing bridge operator showed great presence of mind in opening his bridge to allow passage of the ship, thereby avoiding a collision between ourselves and the structure. Unfortunately, he neglected to halt the flow of traffic before doing so, and in consequence, 5 pedestrians, 3 cyclists, a rickshaw, 3 cars, a double decker bus and a cattle truck were deposited forward of the superstructure island, in the vicinity of the Seadart missile launcher.

It is difficult to be certain at this early stage, but it is my belief (having heard reports on local radio) that the bright flash and concussive rumbling which followed soon after this incident were not, as I had assumed, the prelude to a tropical storm. They were more likely a result of the rampant Seadart missile successfully locating Cathay Pacific flight No. CP103 inbound to Kai Tak from Los Angeles, with 354 persons onboard, fired by a somewhat over zealous Gunnery Officer, who hearing the commotion believed us to be under attack by undesirables and ordered the engagement in self-defence.

The ship was meanwhile continuing its veer to starboard, despite the application of 30º of port wheel. The OOW, in an effort to halt the veer, ordered the letting go of the port anchor. Unfortunately, this novel course of action proved to no avail, since the anchor fell on the swing bridge operator’s cabin – a flimsy structure on which the anchor was unable to gain a useful purchase.

I cannot be entirely sure, but I believe that at about this time, the Harbour Pilot was attempting to offer constructive suggestions as to how we might extricate ourselves from our predicament. However, he had reverted to his native tongue and we were unable to understand a word of what he was screaming.

Notwithstanding the Pilot’s suggestions the OOW decided to raise the port anchor for a second try. Unfortunately, the port anchor had been cleared, but not walked out, and therefore the only consequence of this action was the loss of the port anchor and cable. With our continuing swing to starboard, we were now in peril of running the bow into the South Aberdeen ferry terminus. The OOW therefore decided to raise the starboard anchor in a last desperate attempt to stop the swing.

Unfortunately, the stbd anchor was not the only thing raised from the harbour bed. An electricity cable was raised with it. It was probably the surge of high-tension electricity, which caused all 3 Goalkeeper Close-in-Weapon systems to autonomously engage every member of the local bird population within a 1000m of our location, (each gun expending in excess of 2,000 rounds of ammunition). The action of the OOW did, however, finally halt the swing to stbd. Unfortunately; it also led to an increase of speed towards the ferry terminus.

I now decided to take control of the situation and rang the Ship Control Centre (SCC) to order full astern revolutions. I was informed that the seawater temperature was 16º and that the evening’s films on CCTV were “Enter the Dragon” and “The Battle of Midway”. My comments in reply would not add constructively to this report.

The after tug was running in under our stern when the SCC at last responded to the telegraphs set at full astern. The prompt actions of the Bosun in securing the inboard end of the aft towing hawser delayed the sinking of the tug for some minutes, thereby allowing a partial evacuation of that vessel. It is difficult to ascertain how many members of the tug’s crew went down with her, since the total shore blackout made viewing difficult and hampered the quarterdeck-party’s rescue efforts somewhat.

The bow now swung hard to port. (This was probably due to the disintegration of the stbd propeller while it negotiated the after tug under full astern revolutions). The port bow’s impact with the 20:30 Macao to Aberdeen ferry was cushioned somewhat by the intervening structure of the forward tug (which despite heroic endeavours on the part of her skipper, had been unable to cut herself loose from us!). The impact induced a roll to port, but my ship rapidly recovered to an even keel. You will be pleased to know that the ferry managed to reach the jetty and evacuate all onboard before settling by the stern. I ordered the telegraphs to stop, and we at last coasted to a standstill in mid-channel assisted by the impromptu anchoring effect of the forward tug as it was dragged along the seabed.

It never ceases to amaze me how some people react to moments of minor crisis. For example, the Harbour Pilot is at this instant crooning to himself in the corner of my Day Cabin, having consumed a litre of neat gin in a timescale worthy of inclusion in the Guinness Book of Records, whilst the 2 tugs’ skippers are chained to the after lift safety railings on No.4 deck, from which position I am informed that they are ranting for me to do the impossible with my ship and person.

It also never ceases to amaze me how fortune can smile at moments of adversity. I will offer 3 examples
1. Had it not been for the slowing of my ship’s progress by the boats of the floating village (a relatively soft structure), we may have not avoided contact with the swing bridge (a relatively hard structure).
2. Had I not been dissuaded from having the ships air wing airborne and formatting on the ship during the approach to the berth, one shudders to contemplate the likely consequences of the Goalkeepers uncommanded actions.
3. Finally, had anybody thought to order any of the ship’s Seaking helicopters manned to assist in the rescue of the after tug’s crew, we may have lost some valuable aircrew when the aircraft complement was pitched overboard by the roll to port induced by the collision with the forward tug and ferry. (We are, however, still unable to locate 5 members of the Royal Marines Band).

Another most fortuitous turn of events is that, due to the predominantly American passenger list on flight CP 103, the speculation out here is that an Arab terrorist bomb caused the aircraft’s loss. If, however, news of the incident is accurate in all respects you might like to relay to British Aerospace Missiles Division that at the time of engagement, the aircraft was approximately 23 miles distant, descending through 5,000ft at a relative crossing angle of 85º, and travelling at 400 kts (a truly impressive performance, I am sure you will agree).

I am sure you will also agree that it is most fortuitous indeed that the wreckage of flight CP 103 fell out to sea – thereby avoiding potentially catastrophic damage to the structure and population of the city of Hong Kong. Unfortunately, however, we have since been unable to re-establish contact with HMS Brilliant.

Given the hostile nature of the crowd, which is gathering ashore, I thought it prudent to cancel the cocktail party, and revoke all shore leave. At the last report the MAA assured me that the mutiny was virtually under control.

I am having difficulty in persuading the harbour authorities to grant us the dry-dock facilities which we require. While I appreciate that the presence of the Harbour Master’s wife and brother on the Macao to Aberdeen ferry does not dispose him well towards us, I nevertheless feel that his attitude is unreasonable. Far from offering us the facilities we require, the authorities instead seem intent on towing the ship out to sea at the earliest opportunity to take part in some sort of gunnery exercise.

They seem not in the least deterred by my protestations that the only guns we possess are the 3 Goalkeepers and that these are inoperable as the fire control computers were ultimately burned out – as were all other onboard computer systems (with the exception of the Sega Game boy in the Comms mess) after we dredged up the high tension cable. You may rest assured, however, that I have no intention of moving from our current mooring.

It is in relatively shallow water, so if we do go down we shall at least not go under. In fact, I would go as far as to estimate that if the remaining bilge pumps continue to function, we should be able to keep the keel clear of the bottom for at least another 36 hours (provided we continue to settle at our present rate).

The Executive Officer had the temerity to suggest that if we do settle, we might at least be in a position to enter a bid a Hong Kong’s second airport. I am afraid that, being at this point no longer possessive of a sense of humour, I rewarded this most unhelpful observation with a flogging and threat of Court Martial.

You will appreciate, I am sure, that it is very difficult for me to concentrate at this moment, with all the flashing blue lights, sirens and chanting ashore and the herd of cattle wandering about on the flight deck above my cabin, so a more comprehensive report will follow in due course.

However, for routine reporting purposes, NAVOPDEFS ME 017-031/95, WE 067-091/05, OPS 002-009/95 and AIR 025-076/95 will follow shortly. I will be invoking our FUD 1 status for STOREDEMS for one anchor, one cable, one Seadart missile, various computer equipment, one propeller, 5 Sea Harriers, 12 Seakings (3 x SKW, 9 X SK6), various musical instruments and a sense of humour.

And finally, I request the urgent and immediate authority to obtain 1,000 litres of ship side grey paint by Local Purchase Order, since the conversion of a not inconsiderable tonnage of seagulls into feather scraps and red aerosol has lent the ship a pink hue (with frilly patches) which is most unbefitting a ship of Her Majesty’s Navy.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 13-09-2009, 15:20
qprdave's Avatar
qprdave qprdave is offline
Admiral
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Snyder Texas USA
Posts: 4,663
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report - RN Version

Great piece Siggy
__________________
Non illigitamus carborundum!
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 15-09-2009, 12:56
Francis Stanley's Avatar
Francis Stanley Francis Stanley is offline
Commander
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Portsmouth
Posts: 478
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

Siggy BZ
__________________
Time is a great healer, unless you have a rash, then ointment is probably better.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 17-09-2009, 21:57
gunnersmate's Avatar
gunnersmate gunnersmate is offline
Captain
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Rushden Northamptonshire
Posts: 526
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

Absolutely brilliant Siggy. Well done. Anymore of same?
Baz
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 17-09-2009, 22:07
Jackaroo's Avatar
Jackaroo Jackaroo is offline
Commander
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 409
Talking Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

BZ that man

Cheers
Jack
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 18-09-2009, 09:11
Francis Stanley's Avatar
Francis Stanley Francis Stanley is offline
Commander
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Portsmouth
Posts: 478
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

These great story's reminded me of the one I have posted below


The Bricklayers Tale:

Dear Sir: I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight.
As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry."
__________________
Time is a great healer, unless you have a rash, then ointment is probably better.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 18-09-2009, 20:44
qprdave's Avatar
qprdave qprdave is offline
Admiral
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Snyder Texas USA
Posts: 4,663
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

Well done Francis. A good one
__________________
Non illigitamus carborundum!
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 18-09-2009, 21:14
harry.gibbon's Avatar
harry.gibbon harry.gibbon is offline
Admiral
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Merseyside
Posts: 7,776
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

These great contributions bring me to think that they might make grand fodder for our resident Jim the Paint... I wonder

Little h
__________________

GFXU - HMS Falmouth in Falmouth Bay
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 18-09-2009, 22:08
qprdave's Avatar
qprdave qprdave is offline
Admiral
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Snyder Texas USA
Posts: 4,663
Default Re: Naval Humour - Marine Accident Report

I think that we should stop giving Jim ideas so that he has to stay in his studio longer. His wife is already asking who he is when he walks into the house!!!!
__________________
Non illigitamus carborundum!
Reply With Quote
Reply



Ship Search by Name : Advanced Search
Random Timeline Entry : 1st January 1934 : HMS Iron Duke : Sailed Portland for Portsmouth

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Shore Leave-Humour Gallery astraltrader Shore Leave 44 15-02-2012 11:46
HM Submarine Trenchant: British Nuclear Submarine Accident Surfaces battlestar Royal Navy Ships and Crews 8 27-10-2011 21:47
Death and Disaster: The RAN Accident Prone? kookaburra Australian Navy and Ships 16 12-11-2009 19:40
Researching Family History: Naval & Mercantile Marine Commodore Armiger Other Naval Topics 3 15-09-2008 22:11


All times are GMT. The time now is 19:23.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.