Stokers Talk Only

[ivorthediver]

Ok Guys I need your help pronto please.........

A very good friend of mine asked me what a "trimmer" is in Stoker's parlance

can you help me please ?

[qprdave]

Marine Engineer Hairdresser?????????

[Joseph]

A 'trimmer' moves the coal around in the bunkers to keep it even allowing the ship to stay in trim.

No such an animal in the RN though as the Stoker was an all encompassing Marine Fireman, and in all but normal cruising, trimming in the RN was done by Sailors and Marines.

Regards Charles

[qprdave]

Ivor

You don't think that a little title "Stokers talk only" is going to stop me from interfering, do you?

[Joseph]

No problem with 'Hairdressers' answers here Dave............. not a Stoker then!.

Regards Charles

[gunnersmate]

Ivor,
Being a member of the "Elite" I just don't know what a trimmer is?
But qprdave seems to have given you a bloody good answer.
Baz.

[ivorthediver]

Thanks Charles and Dave I new you would not let me down....record response time even for you on watch ...must be a record.........and your sober on watch of course

Pop down and see Chiefy and tell him I said it was all right for you to have a bottle of our latest batch of pussers special blend [ its 75% proof] don't put it on any polished wood surface though as it is likely to ignite if spilt .......don.t say I didn't warn you

Kind regards Ivor

[Joseph]

"pussers special blend [ its 75% proof]"

Thats weak Ivor in fact lower alcohol content than cheap vodka, generally when alcohol is proof the alcohol content is half, pussers spirit is 54.5% alcohol by volume 93.375 proof.

The thought is nice though.

Here is something I wrote for another forum on Stokers and Coal.

The Royal Navy didn't have Trimmers just Stokers, who were an all encompassing Marine Fireman. The Stoker was trained in the loading, distribution, storage and use of coal. The basics of a Royal Navy steam propulsion system that uses coal, has to use three compartments firstly the bunkers where the coal was stored, then the stokehold where the coal was held until required to be sent down chutes to the boilers.

Bunkers where strategically placed around the ship and used as extra armour by being placed between the outer skin and the boiler/engine rooms, so usually long thin compartments. Coal also came in different grades and calorific values the lower values being used for normal cruising, the higher saved for exercise or battle and stowed near the stokehold (Welsh coal being the preference).The location of coal within the ship would effect the ship's "trim" (i.e., if all of the bunkers on one side of the ship were emptied, she would lean drastically to one side), so the use of coal was monitored to keep the ship in trim. This was supervised by the Chief Stokers and their tanky's the water used to feed the boilers was also a large part of this equation both in what was used and what was produced.

As you could imagine during normal cruising this was a calm steady process, well oiled and managed by the Chief Stoker with Stokers manning or managing the three parts of ship, this gave the younger Stokers time to train and perfect their skills. A large ship would use 500 tons of coal a day under normal cruising conditions, three times that if on exercise or in battle conditions.

The bunkers were hot, often humid, and the air thick with coal dust. Each bunker had to be periodically emptied totally and the build up of dust cleaned out to stop the chance of spontaneous combustion, caused by the coal absorbing moisture and creating heat which would build up until the coal began to burn, a problem to put out usually done by flooding the bunker pumping out and then using the coal straight away.

Working within the bunkers was a terrible job. Since the coal bunkers could be long, men had to shovel the coal around in the bunkers, so that the bunkers could be filled evenly. When the coal was being used, a shovel relay would be set up in the bunkers, so that the coal in the bunker could be used evenly, and a ready supply kept at the entrance to the bunker for transfer to the stokehold. From this point it was shovelled in manageable quantities into the boiler rooms.

The job of 'Trimming' the bunkers was normally done by Sailors and Marines and the first place any army embarked where employed, this task was supervised by PO and Leading Stokers. The Stokers moving the coal from the stokehold to the boiler rooms and feeding the furnaces.

Regards Charles

Regards Charles

[qprdave]

Charles

I can't see anywhere in your answer where they had time to do my answer!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Clearly you guys are sparing nothing in your efforts to 'proof' that 'trimming' your answers from a 93 and a bit% to 54 and an aff% content via the 75% rule will shovel favours with the enthrawled forum members.

But the introduction of a Sweeney Todd arm into the bunker is simply stoking up resentment amongst the embarked Army types and thus I suggest that life must have been easier all round when the oceans were thronging with the super fast clipper as opposed to the poor old trimmer!!!

Little h:):D

[Joseph]

"I can't see anywhere in your answer where they had time to do my answer!!!!"

Sorry Dave,

They had there own Bathroom and the "Ships Barber" got 2d per diam extra pay and no doubt a big tip from those extra special customers.

If he had called himself a "Hairdresser" he would have recieved far more big tips.

Regards Charles

[Joseph]

Harry,

Running up and down the rigging would have its own problems, but I suppose trimming the sails is just as hard for the Dabtoes as shoveling coal.

As for Proof, in days gone yon, the poor matlot used to get ripped of so a system was devised to help him. The 'pussers Spirit' not always Rum was poured over gunpowder and a match put to it, if the gunpowder flarred up the alcohol content was good if it didn't it had too much water in it.

The next time you have a drink of Rum and it burns your throat, whilst giving that special tingle in your nose, you will then see the gunpowder flare in your eyes and then briefly shake your head. Now thats a good whet.

Regards Charles

[harry.gibbon]

Harry,

Running up and down the rigging would have its own problems, but I suppose trimming the sails is just as hard for the Dabtoes as shoveling coal.

As for Proof, in days gone yon, the poor matlot used to get ripped of so a system was devised to help him. The 'pussers Spirit' not always Rum was poured over gunpowder and a match put to it, if the gunpowder flarred up the alcohol content was good if it didn't it had too much water in it.

The next time you have a drink of Rum and it burns your throat, whilst giving that special tingle in your nose, you will then see the gunpowder flare in your eyes and then briefly shake your head. Now thats a good whet.

Regards Charles
Charles, I will 2;6 to that and take the strain. 'Tis gud to observe that all hands are pulling together up top on this one whilst them in their steaming boots down below are still turned in and oblivious to the history of the original ships stabilisers.... yer aktual trimmers.

Little h

[jonti]

Just a quicky. Anyone in the Forum who actually 'coaled ship'? I saw it once in Malta when a tugboat or similar harbour vessel coaled ship from a barge. Rob T

[Paddy]

Ok Guys I need your help pronto please.........

A very good friend of mine asked me what a "trimmer" is in Stoker's parlance

can you help me please ?.

Thanks for your help Ivor,the answer is more or less what I thought it to be but I did not think you would need to find the answer, I thought you were all knowing like Odin.

Paddy.

[ivorthediver]

I'll let you into a little secret Paddy, but don't let that rabble above know,

If I need to know anything about the Navy that I have not found out about thus far.. I ask the Deck strollers, who whilst malingering around with the tins a Bluebell and Mr Muscle, trying to look as if they know what they are doing ,when it goes on the Forum and notification is sent to them of a response to their thread / reply ....they nip into the "head " get out their "Iphone" read the reply and ...set to... composing a reply trying to prove to other Deckstrollers that they are more alert and "Switched" on and that they are not permanently Feeding their pet Gulls with left over bacon butties from the mess........yes I know Paddy but they don't get good bacon like us Stokers and they find it makes them resident in the "Head" if they eat a whole one.....hence the size of their pet Gulls and the "Admiral Browns" they are always saluting........ bless em ;)

You could be forgiven for thinking that its "All in the Head" so to speak

One day these smart alec's will be as bright[as that stuff they polish] and street wise as us Stokers but they still feel inferior to us....... and rightly so

[Macadian]

Can everyone smell It.......................?

I can

It's called Bullsh*t!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Tut tut, be you so mean? Out of the mouths of babes, sucklings.....and Ivor....:rolleyes::cool:

[qprdave]

Sorry Mac......Blame it all on Bubbles. He enjoys winding me up!!!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Strollers and other contributors... they had a valiant try!!!

That's why there is/was an executive branch in the pusser... to get fings dun!

Didn't whiff as good quality Bulls..t tho, moreover D'ya notice the 'steaming boot brigade' had to resort to yer aktual subterfuge?

Thats why they were kept out of sight with an air-lock to seperate the real world from their contamination.

They need polishing oft and put on stoppage of nutty, the glucose content is obviously attacking parts of their being thats giving them presumptions above their station.

Seem to recall that in my posting about 'Admiral browns' it was a stoker who tread water and saluted ... says everything ... there were no other swimmers in the ogin:rolleyes:

Oh and a Vice Commodore is an appointment not a Rank so could look a tad temporary;)

Little h

[qprdave]

Well said Harry

[Macadian]

Well said Harry

Methinks ye both protes'th too much.....;)

[harry.gibbon]

Methinks ye both protes'th too much.....;)
Verily nay nay thrice times nay - me thinketh not, tis the duty of all responsible geezers to help the unfortunates' in society and protest or 're-direction' is one of the means available to we mere subjects

Little h

[Macadian]

Verily nay nay thrice times nay - me thinketh not, tis the duty of all responsible geezers to help the unfortunates' in society and protest or 're-direction' is one of the means available to we mere subjects

Little h


Jings, crivens and help ma Boab...forsooth scurvy nave....you were of the non righteous spawn (branch) for such high and mighty surmising....get yea below with the livestock.....:p:D...given that they permit you to share their lowly quarters....be you so 'mere'

And should they deny you....theirs always yea stokers mess.....

P.S.....this is getting silly...and it's not yet tot time....

[Vegaskip]

Ok Guys I need your help pronto please.........

A very good friend of mine asked me what a "trimmer" is in Stoker's parlance

can you help me please ?

I've read this thread and as far as I can see I appear to be the only one who has actualy done any 'Trimming' and I think I may have mentioned it already in the Paintings thread .

I was cabin boy( no smutty comments please) on a coaster,called LONDON MERCHANT and I used to do trimming and any other jobs in the engine roon and stoke hold.We carried Trimmers and donkey man as well,and I used to do it to earn extra cash,The MN also had lamp trimmers.

[harry.gibbon]

more off'n t'wer that one so lowly, was in the mire.. and though mere not for the merest things at all!!

The livestock therefore shud not be subjected to such a being and thus I fear one might have to set up dwelling above the ladder of the stokers mess to show solidarity with the lesser set.

[qprdave]

Thanks for that Jim.

I won't say anything about "Cabin Boy". Can't speak for the uncouth and drunken stokers in this forum.

[qprdave]

"more off'n t'wer that one so lowly, was in the mire.. and though mere not for the merest things at all!!"

Just waiting for Bill Shakespeare to sign in. He would definitely feel at home!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Jealousy will get you no where..............Us Gentlemen of the machinery who keep you lot busy .....and grooming their Gulls........ thinking they are carrier Pigeons so they can get a lottery ticket placed whilst at sea on the "Euro Millions "

Your just are livid that I can fly my pennant whilst on board and you can,t I Know :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:;):cool:

[qprdave]

"and grooming their Gulls"

Matelots "Gulls" are called Sh*tehawks, Ivor!!!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

:p..as one has intimated... for the moment!!!! I see a paying off pennant in shreds from yon masthead

[Macadian]

And when bored, dangle a mars bar on the end of ye fishing line down said ladder therin that stokers mess, with a thinly disguised entreaty to the most junior of stokers to come forth and see thy collection of livestock in the form of of racing pigeons? In yea paint shop most for'd. Solidarity indeed yee toe rag, nave even.......truth being those ensconced below had seen that Mars bar afore....:eek: And so it was forever scribed in thy daily orders....:cool: Beware three badge men of the executive branches bearing gifts...and nutty. :D

[ivorthediver]

:p..as one has intimated... for the moment!!!! I see a paying off pennant in shreds from yon masthead

So do I ...never mind I will send up a couple off deck strollers to bring it down and replace it with another one I keep for just such eventualities ...it will need two so that they don't lose their way back down to the deck unless they trip base over apex like they usually do and chip the paint work ..but that will keep them busy on the first watch then their hot air will soon dry the paint...won't it :rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

Me thinks that yer actual steaming boots gang are about to have a divisional turn out and give us a show of strength complete with their wheel spanners, (imagine the order "port spanners") in protest at the exec branchs' closure of ranks... 'twill strike fear into exec branch:rolleyes::rolleyes:
After all tis the only weapon of war with which they have exceeding/any expertise (excepting steam hoses on Iceland patrol).

More alarming is that a diver is heading them up, (wonder what a pennant looks like under water??) will they follow herd like to the depths??.

Still there will be the whaler manned by dabtoes to fish them out when they surface... or they could put their oars to a more usefull purpose!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is it said... s..t always comes to the surface:D

Little h

[qprdave]

"will they follow herd like to the depths??."

Will there be a new sub branch :- Marine Engineer (L) as in, Lemmings??

[harry.gibbon]

I signal an end to the independance of the twosome to become an amalgum known henceforth as "Ivorthepaddy".;)

This entity will report the most junior stoker for advice and guidance before making further postings. Such action should show immediate improvements to their understanding of yer proper seagoing geezer.:D

Moreover:-
The amalgum will have the new rank of vice-ringer to accommodoreate their complete lack of respect to other ranks/rates.


All hail progress from sail, to coal, to FFO, to Gas Turbine, to Nuclear so why have still got stokers ... with nothing to shovel from or into??? :confused:

We still have signals in and out to tell them what to do.

Little h

[Macadian]

We still have signals in and out to tell them what to do.

Little h


As in bunting 'tossers' (in and out) ......:cool::D:)

In the best of the best possible taste...cause it is written....:p...at least a wheel spanner was functional...marlin spike anybody....

[ivorthediver]

As in bunting 'tossers' (in and out) ......:cool::D:)

In the best of the best possible taste...cause it is written....:p...at least a wheel spanner was functional...marlin spike anybody....

Typical of deck strollers.......how are you going to send said signals if you have no power generated by the likes of us shipmate ? No planning or preparation .......sorry forgot your "homing Gulls"....there again first minor distraction and they will go AWOL..just like the keepers...i.e. Beano, Tot, crumpet,..not like us stalwart Stokers ,ever present to mother the spotty faced kids topside and keep them alive for when we go shark fishing and need sum "chum"
Stokers were a gift from God to allow the safe passage of flotsam like deck strollers over the seas without fouling up the intakes below water level required by the magnificent engineering masterpieces created by Stokers to keep cool when the gull keepers are chatting to their pets above and trying to promote meaningful coherent conversation......they were trained to do this in an annexe at their school called Chatham ...Chat as in talk...Ham as in actors.....twas ever the case ...twil always be same methinks..:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::cool:

[Vegaskip]

I've read this thread and as far as I can see I appear to be the only one who has actualy done any 'Trimming' and I think I may have mentioned it already in the Paintings thread .

I was cabin boy( no smutty comments please) on a coaster,called LONDON MERCHANT and I used to do trimming and any other jobs in the engine roon and stoke hold.We carried Trimmers and donkey man as well,and I used to do it to earn extra cash,The MN also had lamp trimmers.

Found this pic of the ship in which I stoked and trimmed

46841

[harry.gibbon]

Isn't it just amazing how we (the exec branch hands, that is) kept the thread active for Jim, with quality input and meaningfull jack speek, whilst he sought out and posted that fine pic to complete his own recollection of Trimming.

That is of course,unlike the wheel spanner speek like wot 'Iffor'tdyefer' used to make the thinly veiled inferences to stokers being virtual manor from heaven to to'ther branches aboard yer aktual warship .... to wit:-
"Magnificent engineering masterpieces CREATED by stokers" - Pah :eek:

Well where are the Greenies?? or are they too closely related to the steaming boot brigade of overalls to defend themselves and their profession.

Little h

[ivorthediver]

May have seen a few of these L/H [ excuse pun]on dabtoe's sleeve's but for "exec staff" they always look unkempt " its the gull's [sorry Dave Shitehawks]

Whist us hard working lads below don't dress up like Wren's ours is honest soiling whilst working at our duties to keep you lot warm, comfy, and entertained,and fed , God we mother you lot like a matron

By the way mobile generators used to supply power for your toys constitute a fire hazard and you are not allowed to use them on board
see standing orders......or in your case ....laying orders......:mad:

[qprdave]

Come on Ivor...It seems that you cannot see further than the end of your wheelspanner Just admit it. The Seaman Branch is superior in every aspect to the Greasy, overall clad members of the Marine Engineering Department. (And we didn't have to do Courses that could last 3,4 perhaps 5 years to get there.). We keep to Petty Officers and Chief Petty Officers and not call some of them Arseificers (Spelling?... No It's right!!!!)

So get off of you high horse (or should that be Gennie) and bow down to the supreme beings that everyone knows as Dabtoes!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

qprdave and others;

If I may cross Forums and refer you to Aust Navy & Ships; the Flinders Naval Est. - HMAS Cerberus Thread ... Posting #1 by Kookaburra pic #1 2nd row... "Signal Divn outdoor pool"... says it all me thinks!! evidence that stokers are excluded from even swimming with members of the Exec/Seamans Branch at/from the very beginning of naval careers:D:D

Looks like the RAN have it right;)

Little h

[ivorthediver]

qprdave and others;

If I may cross Forums and refer you to Aust Navy & Ships; the Flinders Naval Est. - HMAS Cerberus Thread ... Posting #1 by Kookaburra pic #1 2nd row... "Signal Divn outdoor pool"... says it all me thinks!! evidence that stokers are excluded from even swimming with members of the Exec/Seamans Branch at/from the very beginning of naval careers:D:D

Looks like the RAN have it right;)

Little h

Well If we become as lapse as you dabtoe's you may end up finding out that you have no choice when we are all in the ogin ?:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

Ivor,

Makes me fink of the ditty "away the noo the sea-boats' crew" ;)
twas always without a stoker ... no need of one in days gone by in a whaler ... no motor ... only oars, which of course would have been used to assist any floundering stoker splashing around in trouble in the oggin weighed down by yer steaming boots.

Little h

[Vegaskip]

Ivor,

Makes me fink of the ditty "away the noo the sea-boats' crew" ;)
twas always without a stoker ... no need of one in days gone by in a whaler ... no motor ... only oars, which of course would have been used to assist any floundering stoker splashing around in trouble in the oggin weighed down by yer steaming boots.

Little h

Harry a wee story aboot stokers in boats

I was captains coxswain on the Vic, we did not usually carry a stoker,( by the way the boat was a Faiery Huntress, and we were in Singapore at the time). The skipper decided on a Banyan, so with the Captain,Cdr Air, CdrE, and Two Australian lady professors, my self and for once a STOKER!, off we went.
Great time was had by all, untill on the way back to Terror I noticed the oil pressure was dropping, shut of the engine, and let stokes have a shufty.
No sooner had he got the hatch open when up steps Cdr E "give's a look .. ah yes, Its the oil supply pipe to the supercharger thats broken,.... just go slow ahead and the supercharger wont cut in, Stokes gives me a funny look and shruggs his sholders, so I flashed her up and went slow ahead.
After about five minutes.... CLUNK!, seized solid! Opened the engine cover and looked in, bilges full off oil.
We were just in sight of the ship but drifting seaward and about to round a bend taking us out of sight of the ship, so it was out with the aldis, my morse was a bit rusty to say the least, so Cdr Air had ago and managed after about ten min, to contact the flag deck and request a tow.
Nothing was said about it but it was about six weeks before a new perkins arrived.
By the way, later talking to stokes he said he though that even not cutting in the s/charge would'nt help, but when Bib E pontificates what can you do.
PS, every body was bursting for a pee so it was decided that the ladies would use the bucket in the cabin and us 'gentlemen' lined the gunn'el
PPS might make an interesting cartoon!

[harry.gibbon]

Jim, like the story, nice one; and what a cartoon that will make...best not do the painting down wind though:D

and

for 'Ivor' ... see now, for once a stoker did as he was told and a new perkins was gained out of Cdr E's diagnostic skills... there would have been nothing gained at all doing the abolutions in the fuel tank, far better over the boats' gunwhale; yes I know its a nautical term but with others there to guide him he would have been 'pointed' in the right direction :eek:

and the good zoomies between them morsed up a solution to get home!!

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Jim, like the story, nice one; and what a cartoon that will make...best not do the painting down wind though:D

and

for 'Ivor' ... see now, for once a stoker did as he was told and a new perkins was gained out of Cdr E's diagnostic skills... there would have been nothing gained at all doing the abolutions in the fuel tank, far better over the boats' gunwhale; yes I know its a nautical term but with others there to guide him he would have been 'pointed' in the right direction :eek:

and the good zoomies between them morsed up a solution to get home!!

Little h

RIGHT lets get this matter ship shape and Bristol fashion !

Belay that sniggering L/H..!

No division of Any NAVAL trade is manned by perfect humane beings......"to err is human" Even a Deck Stroller should be "Able" to work that one out,..however statistically speaking , because of the diversity of " other trades" that go to make up the inferior conglomerate off Deck Strollers, there is bound to be a preponderance of errors occurring due to the lack of interface and communication between the parties concerned....

Now in the unified" Engineering Trades" where everyone is speaking the same language ........WAKE UP AT THE BACK.......so to speak.... the chance of a failure or breakdown is a lot less likely .......having said that there is always "one" who would have been better placed in another trade [ viz the Cdr] who was after a" bit of slap and tickle" in the nautical equivalent of a lay bye ...and not concentrating on the job in hand , and worse still........ not setting a good example to the lower ranks......like wot I do :rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

Like wot u doz?? eh:rolleyes::eek:

Me thinks; much less of a lamp-swing more of a back-pedal!!!

'tis only rite that youz git a chans ti git yer 'ed kleer'd n tri agn, so that yer stokie boys kan git their konfidanse restored in their leeder:rolleyes: ken wot i meen; so ti speek!!

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Like wot u doz?? eh:rolleyes::eek:

Me thinks; much less of a lamp-swing more of a back-pedal!!!

'tis only rite that youz git a chans ti git yer 'ed kleer'd n tri agn, so that yer stokie boys kan git their konfidanse restored in their leeder:rolleyes: ken wot i meen; so ti speek!!

Little h


Us "Stokers" do not do anything backwards .......unlike you Gull perch's .....

we are a more a Gentle and ordered collection of sober God fearing men who only imbibe of the occasional drink so as to show a willingness to mix with others of a lesser station in life such as yourself.......and avoid deckstrollers from feeling that we are wishing to occlude them from our presence
the downside of these actions is that the lesser mortals of the ships crew
accuse us of being obsequious...which is not the case at all we merely like to mix with others of the same calibre and mix with the likes of yourself only to direct and instruct you of your duties, and your obligation to the ships company and the good of the service......

You should not demean yourself of your tasks performed as somebody has to do this ...it is just unfortunate that you were allocated this role in life ;)

[harry.gibbon]

Aaah ha Ivor, initial reaction is that's more like it:p ... but then one thinks it's such a shame that the facilities at good old Netley are no longer available to you;):D

Delusional me thinks, not the best trait for the head of stokin to portray, we'll be gettin FFO all over the sails, Coal mixed in the Diesel and oggin in the Avgas.

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Aaah ha Ivor, initial reaction is that's more like it:p ... but then one thinks it's such a shame that the facilities at good old Netley are no longer available to you;):D

Delusional me thinks, not the best trait for the head of stokin to portray, we'll be gettin FFO all over the sails, Coal mixed in the Diesel and oggin in the Avgas.

Little h

One assumes that Netley is some form of mental institute for Naval misfits...[you should fit in there well L/H ]
In respect of the Freedom From Infection parade ...I am quite sure that whilst this would be a home from home for you and others formally contemplating an "Anchor Watch".....I would not be concerned with that being a God fearing Gentleman , and not subjected to excessive indulgence of the flesh pots frequented by the lower ranks , indeed I only visit the Surgeon Commander for more mundane medication brought on by headaches like you .
With regard to the possibility of incorrect fuels being placed in the wrong hold I feel that as long as your current location and duties are maintained until your next disciplinary hearing , that is unlikely to happen ....and to the best of my knowledge we have no requirement for High Octane petrol on board this vessel ,however I can see why you would be confused about that as anything that complex or demanding would be kept well away from your limited ability.
However as a gesture of good will on behalf of the Stokers benevolent fund I have requested Chiefy to deliver a much diluted measure of rum to you in your current abode to ensure that you are not further depressed by your forthcoming ordeal with your Captain regarding the failure to replace my pennant as ordered .

[sjl]

after all the banter !
have we decided ?
what is a 'trimmer' in stokers parlance?
sjl

[Macadian]

Just for you Ivor....and to educate the users of hot water and air conditioning (when they have done with 'strolling....:)

Found this for you on the web Ivor.... if it's been posted before, sorry......:cool:

This is for the stokers of old

Now each of us from time to time, has gazed upon the sea,
And watched the war ships pulling out, to keep his country free.
And most of us have read a book, or heard a lusty tale,
About the men who sail these ships, though lightning, wind and hail.

But there's a place within each ship, that legend fails to teach.
It's hot below the waterline, it takes a living sole....
A hot metal living hell, that sailors call the Hole.
I houses engines run by steam, that makes the shafts go round,
A place of fire and noise and heat, that beats your spirit down.

Where boilers like a hellish heart with blood of angry steam,
Are moulded gods without remorse, are nightmares in a dream.
Whose threat that from the fire roar, is like living doubt,
That any minute would with scorn, escape and crush you out.

Where turbines scream like tortured souls, alone and lost in hell,
As ordered from above somewhere, they answer every bell.
The men who keep the fires lit, and make the engines run,
Are strangers to the world of light, and rarely see the sun.

They have no time for man or God, no tolerance for fear,
Their aspect pays no living thing, the tribute of a tear.
For there's not much that men can do, that there men haven't done.
Beneath the decks, deep in the hole to make engines run.

For every hour of every day, they keep the watch in hell,
For if the fires ever fail, their ship's a useless shell.
When ships converge to have a war, upon the angry sea,
The men below just grimly smile at what their fate might be.

They're locked below like men fore-doomed. Who hear no battle cry,
It's well assured that if they're hit, the men below will die.
For every days a war down there, when the gauges all read red,
Twelve hundred pounds of superheated steam, can kill you mighty dead.

So if you ever write their sons, or try to tell their tale,'
The very words would make you hear, a fired furnace wail.
And people as a general rule, don't hear of men of steel,
So tittle's heard about the place, that sailor call the hole.

But I can sing about this place, and try to make you see,
The hardened life of men down there, cause one of them is me.
I've seen those sweat soaked heroes fight, in superheated air,
To keep their ship alive and right, though no one knows they're there.

And thus they'll fight for ages on till warships sail no more,
Amid the boilers might heat and the turbines hellish rear.
So when you see a ship pull out, to meet a war like foe,
Remember faintly if you can, "The men who sail below."

Nough said.....:D

[qprdave]

Stoker propaganda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Stoker propaganda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dave,
have you noticed that in order to respond to a three sentence offering these two wheel spanner wealding types have to resort to a three'ish paragraph and/or ten verse diatribe by way of explanation of their tenuous position in the Naval scheme of things.

Not to mention the offerings of alchohol to thinly veil their threats of disciplinary action (outside their sphere of influence of course).

Pity that 'up yer pipe' doesn't easily translate into 'up youz's steamin boots'

Better get round to reading thoroughly their offerings I suppose!!!

c y

Little h

[harry.gibbon]

after all the banter !
have we decided ?
what is a 'trimmer' in stokers parlance?
sjl
sjl,

me thinks postings #25 and #39 are the nearest so far

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Thank you Macadian for the kind thought and aiding me in the thankless task of trying to educate the clones aloft that whatever they procrastinate about and with whatever ferver they bend to their argument it all boils down to one simple fact that they cannot escape viz:

STOKERS RULE O.K.


Perhaps one day they will see the light and wish to repent and ammend their
ways

However as these clones have little or no fibre and our inherently "office Boys"
it is unfair to expect to much of them....which is why they ended up where they are.....the Admiralty is not that stupid it seems..

P.S. avoid the main deck tonight as you might find a Forum Moderator lurking in the dark ready to demote you for not putting this poem this in Baz's bin POEMS AND WORDS of the naval man....I will try to distract him whilst you go down to the Stokers suite for a tot.....tell the lads to give you a bottle and book it to the idiots mess aloft ;)

[ivorthediver]

after all the banter !
have we decided ?
what is a 'trimmer' in stokers parlance?
sjl


Have a read of post 3 on this thread shipmate and join us in the stokers mess later for a tot

[harry.gibbon]

Macadian ... a good anthem for the coal shuffellers I'll give you that:p

Its a shame that its needed, the rest of us just get on with the many and varied tasks we're set, :rolleyes: without the need of self engrandisement:D, and because there is nobody sufficiently qualified from other branches, we often just resort to self deprocation :p:cool: just because we can!!!!:D

Little h

[Macadian]

Have a read of post 3 on this thread shipmate and join us in the stokers mess later for a tot

We are,we,are,we are the Engineers, We can,we can,we can,we can,demolish forty beers,
There's Gunners, TAS rates and buntin tossers too... too, but they cannot drink like us ....(so DON'T invite them Ivor...) :D :D

Re the dit....as the thread was 'Stokers Only' I had hoped the MOD would allow a little latitude on this one....:cool:

[ivorthediver]

As an officer and a gentleman may I invite both L/H and his shadow QPR [ Right hand] down to the officers mess which is adjacent to the Stokers mess, to celebrate QPR Daves promotion and commissariat with L/H for being passed over again

As you are both unable to reach the bottom of your pockets the drinks will be paid for from our hospitality funds , and we will arrange for L/H to be escorted back to his abode afterwards...don't worry I have advised the Captain and he said that he has no objections as he would be unable to jump ship and he will enjoy seeing his headache slow him down at the hearing at eight bells on the middle watch after we have eaten breakfast

[harry.gibbon]

Ooh la la.. big print AND block capitals...(upper case n' all) .. next its gonna be joined up writing

Little h

[Macadian]

Macadian ... a good anthem for the coal shuffellers I'll give you that:p

Its a shame that its needed, the rest of us just get on with the many and varied tasks we're set, :rolleyes: without the need of self engrandisement:D, and because there is nobody sufficiently qualified from other branches, we often just resort to self deprocation :p:cool: just because we can!!!!:D

Little h

A it's the Buffer...and apparently coherent too.....:cool:

For ' self deprocation', read 'self depreciation'.....Monkeys fist anyone....:D

[ivorthediver]

A it's the Buffer...and apparently coherent too.....:cool:

For ' self deprocation', read 'self depreciation'.....Monkeys fist anyone....:D


They would not know what a monkeys fist is Macadian , they only no a four finger gallop...and the Beano

[harry.gibbon]

A it's the Buffer...and apparently coherent too.....:cool:

For ' self deprocation', read 'self depreciation'.....Monkeys fist anyone....:D
Last three words .... NOT BAD when you consider my surname Macadian... LOL 'hands on yer socks etc'

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Last three words .... NOT BAD when you consider my surname Macadian... LOL 'hands on yer socks etc'

Little h

I would not swear to it Macadian but I think you just had a compliment paid you.....it won't last

[Macadian]

I would not swear to it Macadian but I think you just had a compliment paid you.....it won't last

Too true...being on the receiving end of a compliment never goes unpunished....:)...it's a bit like volunteering....:cool:

[ivorthediver]

[quote=Macadian;54105]Too true...being on the receiving end of a compliment never goes unpunished....:)...it's a bit like volunteering....:cool:[/quote

You have my vote there mate, like the attachment where did you get it ?

Its ok........ I think its the Decksrollers bedtime now.:rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

'tis oh so easy:rolleyes:

yer aktual dek stroller is able to keep his own council... to be reticent ... to allow the 'other side'/yer stoker sufficient time to do what they are supremely good at (what am I saying) oh yes shuvvlin ... that is usin that piece of equipment lik wot trimmers used ... but as always to diggin themselves deeper in the admiral brownery.

Aah well its to be expektid;):D

re invite for drinkie poo's MRU ... not permitted .. like daily orders sayz ... keep out of red zone ... or else yer crusher will descend upon yez

Little h

[qprdave]

We would compliment any stoker for anything that they do well....It's just that it happens so rarely that we have forgotten how to do it!!!!!!

[Vegaskip]

Mad!! Mad!!, Your all Mad, thank the great moderator in the sky I was neither.
I suppose I was a Roof Runner, You dont stroll up there ,or a Gannet might bite your Bum.
I can see why you guys appreciate the cartoons, I'll need to get cracking again.

[harry.gibbon]

Mad!! Mad!!, Your all Mad, thank the great moderator in the sky I was neither.
I suppose I was a Roof Runner, You dont stroll up there ,or a Gannet might bite your Bum.
I can see why you guys appreciate the cartoons, I'll need to get cracking again.
Kimmon den Jim, bring it on pleeez, I just love yer kartoons n payntins!!!

time to fetch more culture to this thread and show them steaming boots types

Little h

[Macadian]

We would compliment any stoker for anything that they do well....It's just that it happens so rarely that we have forgotten how to do it!!!!!!

Its just that we are so perfect in all that we do...it becomes a matter of routine...and miracles are so common place in our department...we just take them for granted rather than make a big song and dance about it.:D ..and this perfection encourages those topsides to do likewise.


That's just us you see..the Special 1's...Now, back to painting ship numpties....and don't make so much noise with these bloody chipping hammers!...and don't paint over the Refuelling/Freshwater deck fittings!!! Yes yes yes...I appreciate they are Brass and you have to polish them on occasion, but trust me, painting over them makes them hard to open...OK?

Question...why are warships gray...so the dabtoes don't get confused when they are detailed to paint ship....like having to choose a colour - then you could be really flamboyant...HMS Rainbow Warrior!....In addition, just make sure you don't stand still on the Iron deck for more than a moment during this evolution....:cool:

Yes, yes yes...great job guys, but your supposed to leave the big black band at the top of the funnel BLACK!!!!!

Right now...get burning out those paint pots....

[harry.gibbon]

Its just that we are so perfect in all that we do...it becomes a matter of routine...and miracles are so common place in our department...we just take them for granted rather than make a big song and dance about it.:D ..and this perfection encourages those topsides to do likewise.


That's just us you see..the Special 1's...Now, back to painting ship numpties....and don't make so much noise with these bloody chipping hammers!...and don't paint over the Refuelling/Freshwater deck fittings!!! Yes yes yes...I appreciate they are Brass and you have to polish them on occasion, but trust me, painting over them makes them hard to open...OK?

Question...why are warships gray...so the dabtoes don't get confused when they are detailed to paint ship....like having to choose a colour - then you could be really flamboyant...HMS Rainbow Warrior!....In addition, just make sure you don't stand still on the Iron deck for more than a moment during this evolution....:cool:

Yes, yes yes...great job guys, but your supposed to leave the big black band at the top of the funnel BLACK!!!!!

Right now...get burning out those paint pots....
Macadian...
wots this yes yes yes? its the opposite nae nae and thrice times nae!!! didn't your lot learn any fink from watchin them slap stick ships movies??

also:- your signature is noted "fair winds and a following sea" so what use is a stoker then???

Little h

[Macadian]

Macadian...
wots this yes yes yes? its the opposite nae nae and thrice times nae!!! didn't your lot learn any fink from watchin them slap stick ships movies??

also:- your signature is noted "fair winds and a following sea" so what use is a stoker then???

Little h
yes yes yes (or yea, yea and thrice times yea)= a soothing response to inane and innocuous protestations as a consequence of you lot having got it wrong yet again!!! (real time replicas of slap stick)

...we don't all have time to float about indolently....but for us you would still be trying to get out of Pompey Dockyard under sail!

As to the fair winds and a following sea...for we we 'Special 1's' it's a given.... :cool:

Now I real must turn in...carrying all the 'other' branches does get a tad tiring....

[harry.gibbon]

yes yes yes (or yea, yea and thrice times yea)= a soothing response to inane and innocuous protestations as a consequence of you lot having got it wrong yet again!!! (real time replicas of slap stick)

...we don't all have time to float about indolently....but for us you would still be trying to get out of Pompey Dockyard under sail!

As to the fair winds and a following sea...for we we 'Special 1's' it's a given.... :cool:

Now I real must turn in...carrying all the 'other' branches does get a tad tiring....
Likewise could do with a kip myself: your lot have been a walk in the park today... you must do better, then again you lot can ONLY do better Pipe Down has gone so sling yer steaming boots til the morro

c ya little h

[ivorthediver]

Well if ever proof were needed Macadian here it stands fair and square into the wind........

It would seem that when drafted a deckstroller was filling out the form describing themselves and put a "b" instead of a "D" thus creating the correct word for deckstrollers "DUFFERS"
One can only admire their spirit ....lets face it they top it up often enough !

Be interesting to see how the Captain of his ship [ no not his misses ] deals with him at his hearing this morning ....I do happen to have a spare yardarm that my pennant used to fly from that could be used ....personally I'd like to bring back flogging....but as he would say "twood b lik floogin a dead orse ser"...no I think the yard arm has merit here

Love the attachments depicting our reactions to their comments ..even we have to let of steam now and then ...I know theres nothing better then despatching a duffer to the locker.. ye Gods I am begining to sound like him
I will go and sterilize my mouth with some of chiefy's strongest brew

By the way I have sent a recommendation to Your Admiral of the fleet in Canada [ he is a close friend of Admiral Spewforth Spitstraight [based in Med ] asking him to arrange for your promotion and transfer to a place of your choice so that no pressure can be brought to bear by this duffer should he just be let off with "Special Duties" and a cuation.:(

[ceylon220]

Just a quicky. Anyone in the Forum who actually 'coaled ship'? I saw it once in Malta when a tugboat or similar harbour vessel coaled ship from a barge. Rob T

Rob, The shock to my system was when I was short drafted in 1960 to
the Bar boat "BARBICAN" at Rosyth as a relief for the CPO who had been taken ill,THIS WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF COALING SHIP--YES COAL WAS STILL BEING USED IN THE 60s, and no one was excused this task, from the "Jimmy" (a S/Lt) down to the chef-everybody buckled in, I was only aboard her for a tour round the Scottish Isles and back to Rosyth and managed to get clear of her before she recoaled ready for her next trip, thank gooness!!!!!!!:eek:

[Bee]

Sorry to go back a few posts.....but after having a general wander around the threads....I have to agree with Ivor...STOKERS RULE....and a word for Macadian....I hope you've got your Stoker's poem (at#54) on Baz's poetry site somewhere.
Now, as I'm in the "Stoker's only" section and shouldn't be...I shall beat a swift retreat.
'bye all,
:)Bee

[qprdave]

Bee

How have the evil stokers convinced you?

They are not what they tell you. They are always down deep dark holes, covered in grease! They only come out of their deep dark holes when it is meal time or beer issue (Tot time in the old days). after that they scuttle back to their deep dark holes and do untold evil ceremonies to that "Great God" of the hole, the boiler.

Don't let them tempt you to join them. Stay in the sun and open air, on the upper deck with us God fearing seamen!!!!!

[Macadian]

Sorry to go back a few posts.....but after having a general wander around the threads....I have to agree with Ivor...STOKERS RULE....and a word for Macadian....I hope you've got your Stoker's poem (at#54) on Baz's poetry site somewhere.
Now, as I'm in the "Stoker's only" section and shouldn't be...I shall beat a swift retreat.
'bye all,
:)Bee

Tis done Sir...stokers poem added to relevent thread....and welcome to the the Brotherhood of 'Special1's'....

[ivorthediver]

Bee

How have the evil stokers convinced you?

They are not what they tell you. They are always down deep dark holes, covered in grease! They only come out of their deep dark holes when it is meal time or beer issue (Tot time in the old days). after that they scuttle back to their deep dark holes and do untold evil ceremonies to that "Great God" of the hole, the boiler.

Don't let them tempt you to join them. Stay in the sun and open air, on the upper deck with us God fearing seamen!!!!!

Why ? Have we drafted the entire Deckstrollers crew off the ship ?
That's wonderful and probably as a result of the Defaulters Interview this morning with a certain young Lieutenant on a matter under Queens Regulations and AI Chapter XII..regarding the failure to carry out a lawful and reasonable order to replace a damaged pennant ..

However having heard the explanation of his situation and his distress
at having to appear before his peers and explain himself he has been given a conditional discharge with no demotion, and is due to start his defaulters punishment at eight bells on the morning watch in that he will be obliged to

!/clean the Port anchor chain with wire wool until pronounced clean by CPO
[Chiefy] Hairy Arsh
2/All meals are to be taken in the Stokers mess and a temporary bunk has been made available in the Stokers suite
3/Once he has completed his cleaning of the Port anchor chain the Starboard chain will be cleaned also
4/He will work in the Engineering spaces for a further month as directed by Chiefy and supervised whilst there to make sure he doe's not paint or have contact with any operational equipment contained therein
5/Shore leave and make do and mend is revoked and he will not be allowed any contact with his former shipmates or speak to anyone outside of this area
6/ Any deviation from these orders or disobedience by him will result in formal Court Martial proceedings being taken against him.

That should allow him time to reflect on his attitude to the Engineering dept and set him on a course more suited to his ability and Navigational skills .

I hope he enjoys this lenient sentence and doe's not see it as weakness on our part.

Aproved by Captain H Powby..RN,CDM, BF

Vice Commodore I.T Diver RN [Hons] Sen'Lect on M.M.E.[Hon]
Degree in sub Aquatic observation [Bombay]
Mem W.N.S.F. Founder of,Distillers Marketing
Advisory Council,Reg BSS[ladies]Retd

[harry.gibbon]

Yes Bee,

As Dave (qprdave) included in his previous post... don't be taken in by 'their' attempt to have a Stokers thread at all .. there are dozens of them on the Forum but just this small crazy gang of em that actually DO want to talk to each other.:eek:

And as for dashing off 'their' thread doing a quick retreat ... not a bit of it!!! remember the Communicators background in your family, that is of course in the Executive Branches, which is not for the oilies with their sweat bands and steaming boots.:p

The're never allowed at the head of Divisions, exclusive domain of the Exec Branches.:);)

So take it from your nearest (honorary) relative on the Forum; feel inclusive, add your contribution to this thread and never feel forced to retreat in the face of a wheel spanner or oily rag:D

Little h

[harry.gibbon]

as a response to the declarations oozing forth in post #83 I have with due consideration and NOT much forethought... used, the said Pennant in an appropriate manner... its not lost... its not being returned... it has been used... Yes verily I have found a use for this 'rag' tis to be towed astern (obviously not at speed - that would have to be provided by yer aktual stoker) and used as a uni-foxer of the silent variety ... thus the screws will be heard and we know what will follow!!! The target will be the noisiest part of ship ... no not the boiler room or machinery spaces BUT the stokers mess.

Aaah silence at last

Little h

[Macadian]

Harrum diddy dum diddy dum, harrum diddy dum, diddy dum etchttp://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/Colourwheelspanner.jpghttp://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/crestpic.jpg
Sorry Dabs...could not resist...and so it was written....

[ivorthediver]

as a response to the declarations oozing forth in post #83 I have with due consideration and NOT much forethought... used, the said Pennant in an appropriate manner... its not lost... its not being returned... it has been used... Yes verily I have found a use for this 'rag' tis to be towed astern (obviously not at speed - that would have to be provided by yer aktual stoker) and used as a uni-foxer of the silent variety ... thus the screws will be heard and we know what will follow!!! The target will be the noisiest part of ship ... no not the boiler room or machinery spaces BUT the stokers mess.

Aaah silence at last

Little h

Enjoy it whilst you can...you are spending a month in the company of professional Seaman not self centreed girly types who dress up like Wrens and stroll around with their head up there own......I think you are due to meet him soon..... in the morning at eight bells on the morning watch, I believe :D

[harry.gibbon]

Harrum diddy dum diddy dum, harrum diddy dum, diddy dum etchttp://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/Colourwheelspanner.jpghttp://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/crestpic.jpg

Sorry Dabs...could not resist...and so it was written....
ah - ha TWO targets!!! stand to; nope; belay that.... load #'s 1 to 6 and FIRE

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Good God!.... are we to trust them upstairs when they can't hit a barn door beside themselves ! let alone two......down below decks...I thought they were easily depressed ...they certainly depress us

Great pictures shipmate......:D

[harry.gibbon]

Ivor,

I read in a thread recently something about a 12 hr shift ... well well ... and having to turn-in cause up at 0530 hah ... tis how the mighty have fallen ... dont know what watch you'll be gettin ready fer ... but ... the head of wheel spanners doing watches hah and hah again.:D:p:rolleyes:

How also the Pennant has shredded and the idea that a stoker ever clocked up 12 hrs in a week ... unbelieveable!! Te He He

Little h

[qprdave]

There will be a notice in "Daily Orders" tomorrow that any stoker verbally abusing God's chosen ones will spend the Dogs with a chipping hammer on his hands and knees chipping the paint from the Foc'sle Deck. Dog watchmen of stokers will do their bit on completion of their watch during the First watch. The Chief Stoker and M.E.O. have been informed and are in complete agreement with this!!!!

Divers who have thrown in their lot with the grease monkeys will have to use a rubber chipping hammer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Macadian]

There will be a notice in "Daily Orders" tomorrow that any stoker verbally abusing God's chosen ones will spend the Dogs with a chipping hammer on his hands and knees chipping the paint from the Foc'sle Deck. Dog watchmen of stokers will do their bit on completion of their watch during the First watch. The Chief Stoker and M.E.O. have been informed and are in complete agreement with this!!!!

Divers who have thrown in their lot with the grease monkeys will have to use a rubber chipping hammer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


And then you woke up....:D:D:D...hands off ****, on socks.....;), and leave that man's 'marlin spike' alone...you have one of your own....

[ivorthediver]

A clearer picture is now forming ............

The Deckstrollers are in fact cockroaches that scuttle about the decks and bilges so infesting the whole ship not just their squalid little pits upstairs....

I will have the ship fumigated and a tot to each seaman who brings me a handful of crushed cockroaches ...still they do make a nice noise when trodden on underfoot

Hope the gulls like them to, crushed, peppered, pureed , sober..:mad:

[Macadian]

A tad harsh Ivor, I think you are allowing your penmanship to be commanded by your lofty aspirations to be Admiral of the Fleet. All over the failure of the sand scratchers to do justice to your pennant? Tisk, tisk....our salt encrusted brethren are an important part of the ships company (though not Special1's) and should be treated as such. 'Cockroaches' is going just too far I fear. I see a re-enactment of 'Mutiny on the Bounty' and Captain Bligh (as in Admiral Ivor) did not come out of that particular kerfuffle to well at all.

The seamen and the stokers must be friends....which at the end of the day, whether on a run ashore, or on board, we actually were...and who else is going help us RAS?

Well, that's my yearly dose of humility exhausted...http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/Tease.gif

[harry.gibbon]

T'was perhaps a release of hot (something) from his high pressure relief valve, caused by the self imposed hierarchical position claimed by yon admirable Ivor the spanner:p

Whatever the cause and effect, its to be sure that those of us outside the stoke hole arena will look in on a diatribe of abuse inter-stoker fashion.

We'll prepare a jury rig of sail up top to offset the lack of power available as stoker pits against stoker and all forward momentum and steerage is lost.

Ah well it had to come;):D:rolleyes:

We should enjoy the lull before the storm that undoubtly will ensue

Little h

[Macadian]

Tis but a case of the Chief Stoker having a word in the 'shell-like' of the Cdr E....per AR & QR's....and to spare the lash on those less fortunate members of the ships complement...as in Sand scratchers, of whatever ilk....:cool:

[qprdave]

Mac

It's good to see at least one P/O(SB) (P.O.M.E. that excels in blowing soot!), Backing Ivor!!

Someone has to support this poor deluded diver who has the permanent bends between his ears!!!!


One day he will see the light of the upper deck and refrain from bowing down to that God of the hole, the boiler!!!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

There will be a notice in "Daily Orders" tomorrow that any stoker verbally abusing God's chosen ones will spend the Dogs with a chipping hammer on his hands and knees chipping the paint from the Foc'sle Deck. Dog watchmen of stokers will do their bit on completion of their watch during the First watch. The Chief Stoker and M.E.O. have been informed and are in complete agreement with this!!!!

Divers who have thrown in their lot with the grease monkeys will have to use a rubber chipping hammer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Not on my watch ! :mad:

[ivorthediver]

Mac

It's good to see at least one P/O(SB) (P.O.M.E. that excels in blowing soot!), Backing Ivor!!

Someone has to support this poor deluded diver who has the permanent bends between his ears!!!!


One day he will see the light of the upper deck and refrain from bowing down to that God of the hole, the boiler!!!!!!!!

Who's old Boiler are you referring to Dave

[qprdave]

Stokers don't mind who's Old Boiler they use. They are not fussy after their Tot!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Stokers don't mind who's Old Boiler they use. They are not fussy after their Tot!!!!!!


I can only take your word for that Dave , not having any personal experience to call on
However if you are right then your flock of gull fanciers would seem to have common ground with the Stokers
I tended to be more inclined to put Deckstrollers in the area of page B43 of
Jackspeak myself......;)

[Macadian]

Stokers don't mind who's Old Boiler they use. They are not fussy after their Tot!!!!!!

The way I remember it, the 'Execs' tended to go on the Stokers 'sticky wicket'....:cool:

[qprdave]

5th Amendment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Macadian]

5th Amendment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Indeedy....http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/coolgleamA.gif

[ivorthediver]

Indeedy....http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/coolgleamA.gif


Nearly there my friend......

[ivorthediver]

What was the normal operating pressure required in the boiler/boilers before headway could be made in a ship like a Frigate or Destroyer type please? :confused:

[Macadian]

What was the normal operating pressure required in the boiler/boilers before headway could be made in a ship like a Frigate or Destroyer type please? :confused:

My...memory banks are struggling with this so may need some help. Frigates such as the old type 15's with Admiralty three drum boilers steamed at around 550 psi and a superheated steam temperature of 800 degrees F or thereabouts. Turbines did not like moisture, water droplets etc when operating hence the temperature of the superheated steam needing to be in the above range. Also meant the Water tender (usually a Killick stoker) had to be on the ball keeping an eye on the water drum level....a malfunction of the feed water regulator could cause 'carry over' of feed water with the steam. Like wise, a shortage of water could also be catastrophic! Think the maximum temp was 850 degrees F, though I stand to be corrected. Ships such as the Leanders, Whitbys etc, equipped with Yarrow boilers were operated at similar pressures and temps, however Admiralty Three Drum boiler Rooms were pressurised boiler rooms, requiring the negotiation of an air lock on entering and leaving the boiler room. Yarrow boilers however were enclosed within an air casing so to speak, the air to ensure combustion being trunked directly to the furnace within the sealed casing by the steam turbine driven Forced Draft Fans. This negated the need for pressurised boiler rooms and of course, air locks. Admiralty three drum boilers were however, open front boilers , air being forced into the boiler room by huge turbine driven Forced Draft Fans hence the boiler room being pressurised and the need for air locks. Someone opening both air lock doors simultaneously would cause the boilers to 'flash back' , not to mention more than a little pulsation, which if severe, could damage the fire brick within the furnace, as a consequence of the sudden loss of air pressure in the boiler room. Not appreciated by the POM(E) of the watch and his crew...guaranteed to ensure a wheel spanner flying through the air towards you!!! The air lock had a lighting set up which when both air lock doors were closed, was illuminated. When one of the doors was opened, the light went out, till it was closed again. The doors had a glass inspection window so that the 'state' of the airlock could be ascertained prior to opening one of the doors....

The ship could not get under way until the above steam pressures/temps had been attained, hence 'watch below' being in the early hours of the morning to 'flash up' per the Engineers orders...

And so end'th the lesson...http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/SDIWS.png

P.S....What no Fleet Chief rate...something far wrong here!!!...I don't want to go to the Wardroom...can I be demoted back to Stoker PO please....:cool:

[ivorthediver]

Thank you for your detailed answer ....I would expect nothing less from a pro' like you....... and knew I would not be disappointed ...Thank you ,I like to find out these points of operation in the boiler room to get a feel for what it was really like and a kind off time scale in my mind of the sequence of events which had to be gone through to be able to "feel the system"

Your observation for detail is gratifying and that you should remember these details doe's you credit !

Ref ward room you have earned it ....and you don't have to mix with deckstrollers if you wish not to

Seriously though, many thanks...Regards Ivor

[qprdave]

"What no Fleet Chief rate...something far wrong here!!!...I don't want to go to the Wardroom...can I be demoted back to Stoker PO please.."

Welcombe to the Wardroom Mac. Sorry, no voluntary demotion in this navy. That is the Admirals prerogative to do it. So go up to him and bop him on the nose. I am sure that you won't be in the Wardroom very long. Probably end up as a Junior Stoker when you come out of cells.

[harry.gibbon]

Ah yes the air-lock,

Unfortunately I was aquainted with several 'non-stokers' who wouldn't go near these essential features, so ye kind of got lumbered with all the visits whether it be on dhobi runs or work related.

Some fun often had negotiating same with a number of bags of confidential waste at a time. Even more so if the iron deck was a 'bit awash', and getting the timing right.

Think I have alluded to this before in another thread:confused:

Little h

[Macadian]

"What no Fleet Chief rate...something far wrong here!!!...I don't want to go to the Wardroom...can I be demoted back to Stoker PO please.."

Welcombe to the Wardroom Mac. Sorry, no voluntary demotion in this navy. That is the Admirals prerogative to do it. So go up to him and bop him on the nose. I am sure that you won't be in the Wardroom very long. Probably end up as a Junior Stoker when you come out of cells.


Might be worth it...as long as they don't stop my tot too....problem is, someone told them I was on my way, and they won't open the Wardroom door...said I was a SD...so not a 'proper orificer'...:cool:

[qprdave]

That's what happens when you fraternize with Commodores. The Junior Officers think that you are brown nosing

[Macadian]

That's what happens when you fraternize with Commodores. The Junior Officers thing that you are brown nosing

Junior officers thing!!!!!!:eek:

[ivorthediver]

Junior officers thing!!!!!!:eek:


Keep them in order Mac, what you lack in rank regarding Deckstrollers, you make up for with superior knowledge of the ship, wisdom, and street cred.

If you have any trouble with the bar in the wardroom I'll run them dry, that should sort them out....:(

[qprdave]

Ivor...

You need stop stop fraternizing with Mac. You are holding him back from advancement. Even his fellow Orificers resent him being in the Wardroom and it is stopping him from enjoying his Pink Gins and Horses Necks. He is also unable to avail himself of the privilege of having Orificers Stewards to help him with his bib and put him in his high chair.

[ivorthediver]

Don't worry Dave he is a" big boy" now and will soon have your ticket clipped

I watch every posting with great enjoyment ,and I am glad he is in the hot seat at the moment....give me a break to deal with other issues like the Admirals delayed "Shipment" that he is giving me hell about.

Maybe "Paddy" will come and give him some moral support, or "Oldsalt" I know they all watch and are ready to jump in and ...to use a yank expression ......
..."Kick Arse" should they feel it is required or you start harassing him to much.

Word has it that L/H is adjusting to the Stokers world very well and played bingo with lads in the mess last night, almost seems to be normal....but must confess that Chiefy laced his nightcap to help him sleep on his first night in the Stokers domain
If he carries on like this he will have a much shorter sentence as he has already proved to be better than the average Deckstroller..................

even said he liked Macadian's cartoon's

[harry.gibbon]

Hey up B.gg.r lugs the diver, wots all this bilge:confused::p

Bingo nope -Tombola yes; in stokers hole nope - in local Naval Fleet Club yes; complimenting yer aktual stokers cartoons... well twas imported from some web facility obviously n can't be recognised as other than a good choice;

Yer Pennant is well shredded - and punishment meeted out - not accepted without a warrant, which requires for a clear lower deck muster on quarterdeck n pin back yer lug-oils for the readin of same!!:):p

Little h

[qprdave]

Harry

I knew that you wouldn't succumb to the stokers devilish tricks to join them. And I know that you would never bow down to that "Great God" of the hole, The Boiler!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Harry

I knew that you wouldn't succumb to the stokers devilish tricks to join them. And I know that you would never bow down to that "Great God" of the hole, The Boiler!!!!!!!!
I'll tell you what Dave if you remember correctly; one didn't bow down to or in front of anyone at anytime .. ever; especially on that most hallowed of places the footplate!!!

Little h

[Macadian]

I'll tell you what Dave if you remember correctly; one didn't bow down to or in front of anyone at anytime .. ever; especially on that most hallowed of places the footplate!!!

Little h

Or drop the soap in the sand scratchers bath roomhttp://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/winetaster.gif

[qprdave]

Good evening Mac

How is it in the land of the Canuck.

Pretty cool down here in Texas. Only got to 89F

[ceylon220]

Someone has experienced the "Golden Rivet" here, now I wonder who that was---no bending down on the plates.!!!!!! :D

[qprdave]

Never seen the Golden rivet in my life....Come to think of it, I wouldn't admit to it if I had!!!!!!!!!!!

[Macadian]

Good evening Mac

How is it in the land of the Canuck.

Pretty cool down here in Texas. Only got to 89F


Hi Dave, all well here in the Great white North...raining today so getting on with the wife's 'honey - do' list indoors. warming up nicely....warm summer in prospect.

Golden rivet? Never did find it....http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/coolgleamA.gif

Another hour and it's sunset...my 'tot time' approach'th....:cool:

[harry.gibbon]

You could always drop the soap in dabtoe's bathroom/shower and know it would still be there till whenever!!!

But, as for the inference of Ceylon220, might just be a Cumbrian thing we don't know ... there must have been a use for you stoker types to put those oily rags to:eek: always one in the hand so to speak and a sweat towel round the neck:)

One wonders which pub was frequented outside the dockyard gates at Portland in that rig:D

Little h

[Macadian]

You could always drop the soap in dabtoe's bathroom/shower and know it would still be there till whenever!!!

Little h

And why would that be I wonder????...Cause so few of the those crabby rates use the stuff...:D...though someone might remove it and take it to the stokers mess, as they know their is a market for it in that locale...http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/SmileyFinger53_T45QMY.gif

[harry.gibbon]

Mac... Hmmmm Yesss takes some thinking about that answer:D your idea of the local currency and what you might get for it leaves me with the need to get off to kip; n get ready for the moro whatever that brings and whatever it costs in whatever the currency ... alternatively one might get into a lather thinkin wot you ever got for a used bar of brown (for use in salt water) pussers hard!!!

and somebody was talking about the sticky wicket several posts ago ... Nah Nah I'm off to bed.

c yaz all

Little h

[Macadian]

Mac... Hmmmm Yesss takes some thinking about that answer:D your idea of the local currency and what you might get for it leaves me with the need to get off to kip; n get ready for the moro whatever that brings and whatever it costs in whatever the currency ... alternatively one might get into a lather thinkin wot you ever got for a used bar of brown (for use in salt water) pussers hard!!!

and somebody was talking about the sticky wicket several posts ago ... Nah Nah I'm off to bed.

c yaz all

Little h

Pussars hard...thought you big roughy toughies used Fairey...or Lux....that is when you did....:D....as for you getting into a lather...foam making branch pipe anyone...ox blood is more your style I feel....


Enjoy your kip. You probably have had lots of practice in the past...Guard & steerage?.....:cool:....dream on.

[ivorthediver]

Pussars hard...thought you big roughy toughies used Fairey...or Lux....that is when you did....:D....as for you getting into a lather...foam making branch pipe anyone...ox blood is more your style I feel....


Enjoy your kip. You probably have had lots of practice in the past...Guard & steerage?.....:cool:....dream on.


That's my boy , keep them in their place Mac, .....love the cartoons....no not the "Fairey's"..... I'm talking about the animated one's ...........there more fun
to look at and don't pollute the air with their various after shave / deodorant
vapour trails wafting behind them as they go through the air lock....
Nothing wrong with Carbolic or Lifeguard soap .....and the WREN's prefer [not to have their perfume's drowned by a Deckstrollers waft.....] but a man to smell like a man...not a "Fairey"

I'm glad we have some semblance of the male species aboard or the girls ashore would think that we are "confused" on this ship... like those above

[ivorthediver]

Hey up B.gg.r lugs the diver, wots all this bilge:confused::p

Bingo nope -Tombola yes; in stokers hole nope - in local Naval Fleet Club yes; complimenting yer aktual stokers cartoons... well twas imported from some web facility obviously n can't be recognised as other than a good choice;

Yer Pennant is well shredded - and punishment meeted out - not accepted without a warrant, which requires for a clear lower deck muster on quarterdeck n pin back yer lug-oils for the readin of same!!:):p

Little h

Officer...... with lower Ranks thinking ? that seems strange to me

[harry.gibbon]

Ah dear dear whatever next ... Mac-Ivor in London-Scottish role reversal; (hmm shades of more pussers hard again;)!!)

As to lower ranks thinking...
So the osifer ranks have some upper 'deck' thinking that takes no account of lower deck heritage Nah nah taint like that. Off they go in isolation to a big house in the west country to have inculcated into them all those special requirements thought necessary to uphold the gold braid.:p Well... in times past money would have bought that or heritage or both.

But yer SD osifer and whatever their successors are called nowadays can have the benifit of both cultures, whilst yer senior rates will hold the organisation together with their special culture learned in the confines of the WO's & SR's Messes.

I'm gonna cherish the heritage from whence I came whilst offering congratulations to those folk who made the leap to a Commission.

Stokers and Seaman branches would be unable to have this banter (sorry serious exchanges) :)without this thinking...

Geez that feels better ... bring it on boys.:D

Little h (cause its impossible for me to get on a high horse):rolleyes:

[ivorthediver]

Ah dear dear whatever next ... Mac-Ivor in London-Scottish role reversal; (hmm shades of more pussers hard again;)!!)

As to lower ranks thinking...
So the osifer ranks have some upper 'deck' thinking that takes no account of lower deck heritage Nah nah taint like that. Off they go in isolation to a big house in the west country to have inculcated into them all those special requirements thought necessary to uphold the gold braid.:p Well... in times past money would have bought that or heritage or both.

But yer SD osifer and whatever their successors are called nowadays can have the benifit of both cultures, whilst yer senior rates will hold the organisation together with their special culture learned in the confines of the WO's & SR's Messes.

I'm gonna cherish the heritage from whence I came whilst offering congratulations to those folk who made the leap to a Commission.

Stokers and Seaman branches would be unable to have this banter (sorry serious exchanges) :)without this thinking...

Geez that feels better ... bring it on boys.:D

Little h (cause its impossible for me to get on a high horse):rolleyes:

Never mind have a look at Jims Pic that will cheer you up and bring a smile to your puckered face.

By the bye ...take a shower you even smell like a stoker know....so there is hope yet of making the grade.

Have a word with Chiefy he has a spare pair of steeps for you to mount your bike with.

In case we are accused of being to harsh on you , there will be no charge you the steeps, but you will have to sign a chit for them...of course

Don't take it personally we think your quite a nice Deckstroller Really two of the lads took pics of you whilst asleep in the mess last night whilst you were having a nightmare , don't worry we have boiled the sheets now and one of the stokers has remade your bed for you , and will wait till you get back with a hot tot for you to help you sleep.

[harry.gibbon]

I'm declining the offer of yer steeps mainly because I already got a chitty and yours wouldn't be non-skid due to all the oily hands having fetched it up from stores...

Take it Personal .. nope ...none taken as they say on radio 2.

Jim has done us proud with our own very special cartoon for yer thread !!! Wonder if any other thread has its own dedicated cartoon ???

Little h Gee-up dobbin

[ivorthediver]

I'm declining the offer of yer steeps mainly because I already got a chitty and yours wouldn't be non-skid due to all the oily hands having fetched it up from stores...

Take it Personal .. nope ...none taken as they say on radio 2.

Jim has done us proud with our own very special cartoon for yer thread !!! Wonder if any other thread has its own dedicated cartoon ???

Little h Gee-up dobbin


You want certifying ......no wonder you were made an EXHECK OFFICER

"EX"... has been.....".HECK" northern expression for alarm... if you were well heeled...... it was amended to "Buy HECK"

You are absolutely right there mate Jim has done us proud ...still chuckling about the painting .....but where is MY pennant ..the new one issued :rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

Hey up there lad... on a kind of a serious note (t'wont last you understand)

Re; Jims cartoon!!:):D

Ivor and Paddy; as the Thread Starters:p and compatriot Posters to the thread (which has matured into a fine thread) can I just comment that on close viewing of the cartoon Jim has indeed done a considerable amount of note taking about the postings and reflected same in representative form.:)

Are we joined in a collective Bravo Zulu to him??:D

Little h

[Macadian]

Hey up there lad... on a kind of a serious note (t'wont last you understand)

Re; Jims cartoon!!:):D

Ivor and Paddy; as the Thread Starters:p and compatriot Posters to the thread (which has matured into a fine thread) can I just comment that on close viewing of the cartoon Jim has indeed done a considerable amount of note taking about the postings and reflected same in representative form.:)

Are we joined in a collective Bravo Zulu to him??:D

Little h

Ok troops, I have been a very busy little Engineer today...someone mentioned a Cartoon by Jim...I have searched every Machinery space and can find no trace of it. I can only assume it's on the 'upper scupper' somewhere...which is somewhat challenging...so much fresh air and daylight....So can someone be kind enough to advise me where on the thread/ board/upper deck said cartoon is....:confused::D

[harry.gibbon]

Anything to help out yer other kind of geezer with the oily wellies... its on Everything Else; Jims Ship Paintings

Little h:)

[qprdave]

I've looked there, Little h. Can't find it.......Must have spent too much time as starboard lookout and the binoculars must have damaged my eyes. How far back s it. i.e. Post #.

[harry.gibbon]

I've looked there, Little h. Can't find it.......Must have spent too much time as starboard lookout and the binoculars must have damaged my eyes. How far back s it. i.e. Post #.
hang fire me old matey I'll chart the course again Little h

[harry.gibbon]

POST #276 on the site/thread/ and now posting identified to your tired old eyes :D

come bak if'n yer kant git it straat away ish

Little h

[Macadian]

Anything to help out yer other kind of geezer with the oily wellies... its on Everything Else; Jims Ship Paintings

Little h:)

A thousand thank you's shipper....will make sure you get access to a steam drain next time you are detailed to make the kye....:cool:

[qprdave]

OK.... Little H

Found it...Thanks

Looks like nothing has changed. Seamen and Stokers working. Stewards, Jack Dusties getting bronzy bronzy time in!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Wouldn't it be grand if one of the nice Moderators was super kind and moved that superb cartoon of Jims' to this Thread as a mark of respect to his diligence in reflecting the mood of the postings thus far...;) Little h

[Macadian]

Wouldn't it be grand if one of the nice Moderators was super kind and moved that superb cartoon of Jims' to this Thread as a mark of respect to his diligence in reflecting the mood of the postings thus far...;) Little h

Spiffing idea old chap! Is that sufficiently 'wardroom' like?:cool:

Never get used to this wardroom nonsense...I think we should also lobby for the rate of Fleet Chief...and that on attaining it we should be permitted to remain there...What say thee? You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear...so why revert to a sow's ear on promotion to the WNSF Wardroom?:cool:

[harry.gibbon]

Mac wardroom speek or ovvawize just refer to my posting #131 and my stance is defined therein!!:)

Meanwhile in order to get best result from moderator and 'Jim the paint'; I may/will just keep a lowish profile ... as any proper ex matelot would... wot wontz a favor frum'th iher-arkay.

Then a more definitive answer will be forthcoming.;

Little h

[Macadian]

Mac wardroom speek or ovvawize just refer to my posting #131 and my stance is defined therein!!:)

Meanwhile in order to get best result from moderator and 'Jim the paint'; I may/will just keep a lowish profile ... as any proper ex matelot would... wot wontz a favor frum'th iher-arkay.

Then a more definitive answer will be forthcoming.;

Little h

Now your talking wankspeak...as in diplomacy? Not an animal I had much to do with in t t'mob....or since....:Da wheel spanner is a wheel spanner is a wheel spanner...that's all it will ever be...:cool:

But if you insist...:D

Now get off to bed, nursie will be along soon to tuck you in.....

[harry.gibbon]

Nope, not at all... the means justify the end ... and a spanner in the works is just like a northerner saying I only tell/speak it like it is... Yeh; but if he/she is wrong ... then, what a wasted opportunity (and that was not what I was gonna type!!!).

Nappies n nurses not required; as I said - look at the posting # 131 ... at least I pinned my pennant to the mast. :rolleyes: and followed through by leaving the pusser because of decisions that I didn't agree with!!! Unlike a shedfull who put up with the c..p and saw their time out in order to secure their first home ... Aaaaah I won't go on:mad:

Anyways-up gud nite n see yaz in the morro

Little h

[harry.gibbon]

Oih Ivor watcha doin involving yersel in a Questionaire about a Seamans' part of ship on another Thread???:D

All this F'cstle equipment you are 'professoring on about' without any mention to the Exec branch about what powers the capstain in things!!

Its become clear that the reason you've shifted onto t'other thread is that you have belatedly had to accept the demise of steam in favour of electricity and feel uncomfortable about issueing forth about it on here.. Oh well the some of your stokey boys will surely rally to your aid :rolleyes:

Little h

[ivorthediver]

Oih Ivor watcha doin involving yersel in a Questionaire about a Seamans' part of ship on another Thread???:D

All this F'cstle equipment you are 'professoring on about' without any mention to the Exec branch about what powers the capstain in things!!

Its become clear that the reason you've shifted onto t'other thread is that you have belatedly had to accept the demise of steam in favour of electricity and feel uncomfortable about issueing forth about it on here.. Oh well the some of your stokey boys will surely rally to your aid :rolleyes:

Little h

so you have finished the Exam then...? let me try and guess how many marks you had............................................... ......................:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleye s::rolleyes:

[Vegaskip]

Here's a little apetiser, I have just been sitting watching 'South Pacific' documentry and the following program which is on at the moment about evolution, and I thought evolution!, fish'eads, stok'rs, chefs, greenies, wafu's,...... so I grabed my sketch pad , and did some preliminaries.So keep an eye open you might see a portrait of your self .....soon.

[harry.gibbon]

so you have finished the Exam then...? let me try and guess how many marks you had............................................... ......................:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleye s::rolleyes:
Yes my exam is completed...

[Macadian]

Yes my exam is completed...

Yea, and apart from the usual aches and pains of age, you have also been certified...but they can't quite figure out as what....:D

[harry.gibbon]

cheeky git Mac... the exam certified that I is bouyant, to the point of needing to be anchored down, chains will be no good since I will respond to a fair lead, thus becoming electrified and will need to be degaussed, to combat my magnetic wit.:D:)

Little h

[ivorthediver]

cheeky git Mac... the exam certified that I is bouyant, to the point of needing to be anchored down, chains will be no good since I will respond to a fair lead, thus becoming electrified and will need to be degaussed, to combat my magnetic wit.:D:)

Little h


MAN OVERBOARD !

[harry.gibbon]

MAN OVERBOARD !
wotz dis den??? wishfull finkin!!!!

[ivorthediver]

wotz dis den??? wishfull finkin!!!!


Harry if you were overboard I would order the stokers to go in and get you out .....the treat of this alone you ensure you get back on board very quickly:D

[qprdave]

"Harry if you were overboard I would order the stokers to go in and get you out"

Stokers getting their feet and overalls wet...?????

What Navy are you talking about???????????????????????

[harry.gibbon]

"Harry if you were overboard I would order the stokers to go in and get you out"

Stokers getting their feet and overalls wet...?????

What Navy are you talking about???????????????????????
Dave what is he on??? and in which Navy is he c-in-c stokey boys of???

There is clearly a flaw in his composition and needs to be treated with some sceptisism... what am I saying ... you've taught me that thats the way he has always been treated on this thread

Little h

[qprdave]

I am sure that in some Admiralty Experimental Establishment they have proved that bubbles and Grease with a wheel spanner thrown in doesn't mix!!!!!!!!!. Especially when sea water from saving all those dabtoes is added

[ivorthediver]

Here's a little apetiser, I have just been sitting watching 'South Pacific' documentry and the following program which is on at the moment about evolution, and I thought evolution!, fish'eads, stok'rs, chefs, greenies, wafu's,...... so I grabed my sketch pad , and did some preliminaries.So keep an eye open you might see a portrait of your self .....soon.


Sounds interesting Jim..

[ivorthediver]

I am sure that in some Admiralty Experimental Establishment they have proved that bubbles and Grease with a wheel spanner thrown in doesn't mix!!!!!!!!!. Especially when sea water from saving all those dabtoes is added

I never realised until now ,how to whip you Fairies into shape .
We Stoker Commanders have tried :-

Kindness............Seen as weakness
Comradeship...... Seen as turning the other cheek and having your drink stolen
Education......... Well that was doomed from the start..........but worth a try
Female's........... Got killed in the rush
Alcohol.............make's you louder and even more nauseous
Detention......... Inclined to make you sulk and write graffiti on the bulkheads
Pet's............... Covered the ship in crap and rotted your uniforms
A 1 Victuals...... Sold ashore
Bupa cover....... Never seen such an increase in ailments and time off Watch

So with immediate effect all deckstrollers will have FOUR WATCHES in 24 hours and extra duties at the Department heads discretion
This to be on a 6 months trial period and if this doe's not work threaten you with D.D. unless you pull your weight... :mad::mad::mad::rolleyes::mad:

[Bee]

So this is where you all hang out when I'm away? Not that I read anything here....'tis all a bit too blokey. (Which, of course is ok for blokes.)
But I'll let you in to a secret....our dear Paddy is related to "Nunk" a Stoker/survivor from the Titanic - read his poem on Baz's poetry site - 'tis good.
Also, I've finally put up a couple of pics on the Aegean thread....and no Ivor....they're not the type you were thinking of!!
Cheers,
Bee :):):)

[qprdave]

Careful Bee

It is not safe for a decent woman like you to go down the Stokers Mess without a Chaperone....

Us Dabtoes (Seaman) only venture down here to cause trouble and throw abuse at the stokers. Sometimes we try and do what the Padre continues to fail at and that is to show the stokers the light and convince them that the only way to lead a decent life is to desert the stokers mess and join the God fearing Seamen on the upperdeck!!!!

[ivorthediver]

So this is where you all hang out when I'm away? Not that I read anything here....'tis all a bit too blokey. (Which, of course is ok for blokes.)
But I'll let you in to a secret....our dear Paddy is related to "Nunk" a Stoker/survivor from the Titanic - read his poem on Baz's poetry site - 'tis good.
Also, I've finally put up a couple of pics on the Aegean thread....and no Ivor....they're not the type you were thinking of!!
Cheers,
Bee :):):)

Come on Bee where is the stokers pin up they have been pleading for , we are pleased to see you here of course , but be fair you are of the female gender and the lads like to see the latest crew members.:rolleyes:

We Stokers will even forgive you being related to little Harry. as you can obviously stand up for yourself having older brothers, and would not let an impediment like that hold you back in life..would you.

You are always welcome Here

[Bee]

Good try Ivor,

And yes - you're right - having older brothers has given me a good immunity....I know the ways of your species ;)

Regards
Bee :)

[harry.gibbon]

Oih there Ivor you Oik!!! leave off my nearest relative on this Forum :mad: Just cause we have the only cartoon for a Thread (ok yours),:rolleyes:
Yer not immune to the caricatureing skills of Jim the brushstroke:)you know:rolleyes:

Been logged out for only a couple of hours and but for qprdave keepin a taught wire on ya, you'd have given even the hairiest stoker a bad name with your suggestive approaches to the tender Bee. Leave it oft diver or yer tanks will be tampered wif (in the most positive way):p

Anyway nice to see Bee on the thread where maybe her influence (if she's not been scared off) will get you steamin boot types back on yer seat lockers doin yer knittin and sewin tween watches... which means 12 hours:D

For Bee I'm sure you can have bestowed on you an honorary Exec Branch membership with no hidden agendas attached to the title , unlike yon stokey boys

Little h

[ceylon220]

You could always drop the soap in dabtoe's bathroom/shower and know it would still be there till whenever!!!

But, as for the inference of Ceylon220, might just be a Cumbrian thing we don't know ... there must have been a use for you stoker types to put those oily rags to:eek: always one in the hand so to speak and a sweat towel round the neck:)

One wonders which pub was frequented outside the dockyard gates at Portland in that rig:D

Little h

Interference by ceylon 220? I thought that this was an open discussion not a private subject for Harry Gibbon only !!!!!!!!:rolleyes:

[harry.gibbon]

Interference by ceylon 220? I thought that this was an open discussion not a private subject for Harry Gibbon only !!!!!!!!:rolleyes:
Dave you have quoted my message in your reply ... but ... then used a word in your posting that is NOT in my message!!!! I used the word inference NOT interference!!!

Little h

[qprdave]

Congratulations Ivor on reaching Admiral.....Got it made now. Any Golf Course of your choice, Country Clubs, Tennis Clubs, Perhaps even, a Member of MCC!!!!!!!!!

(Now you don't have to mix with that lot down in the machinery Spaces!!!!!!)

[Bee]

Careful Bee

It is not safe for a decent woman like you to go down the Stokers Mess without a Chaperone....

Us Dabtoes (Seaman) only venture down here to cause trouble and throw abuse at the stokers. Sometimes we try and do what the Padre continues to fail at and that is to show the stokers the light and convince them that the only way to lead a decent life is to desert the stokers mess and join the God fearing Seamen on the upperdeck!!!!

Sorry qprDave I must have skipped right past this post of yours, (averting my eyes to the last post only...that of Ivor's...at the time.) Anyway, it's good to know that we "decent women folk" have chaperones, of the likes of you and (hon.) Uncle h when venturing to the Stoker's mess....(even though stokers are still okay).
I'm sure that the God fearing Stokers would also chaperone me (and other female kind) when on the upper deck.
'bye for now
Bee.:)
p.s. Ceylon 220....practise this...inference, inference,inference (100x) :):)

[ceylon220]

Dave you have quoted my message in your reply ... but ... then used a word in your posting that is NOT in my message!!!! I used the word inference NOT interference!!!

Little h

Sorry mate ,my blunder, must get my glasses changed,back to the stokehold!!!! :o:o:o


Dave (ceylon220)

[harry.gibbon]

Sorry mate ,my blunder, must get my glasses changed,back to the stokehold!!!! :o:o:o


Dave (ceylon220)
Thats ok Mate were a kindly lot in the Exec Branch, just thank your lucky stars that coal has gone or you'd be 'trimming' for weeks to get out of that!!

C yaz Little h

[Macadian]

Sorry mate ,my blunder, must get my glasses changed,back to the stokehold!!!! :o:o:o


Dave (ceylon220)

Nay, Nay and thrice nay....we don't want you...please try the Regulating branch (as in 'Bone Domes, Crushers etc) ....:cool:...they are made up every other branch's rejects....Having said that, your indiscretion I doubt warrants such a fate...but you never know...:eek:.

[ivorthediver]

Nay, Nay and thrice nay....we don't want you...please try the Regulating branch (as in 'Bone Domes, Crushers etc) ....:cool:...they are made up every other branch's rejects....Having said that, your indiscretion I doubt warrants such a fate...but you never know...:eek:.

Hello shipmate where have you been, I was beginning to think that the Dabtoe's were getting to you, and you needed some R+R from their feeble rantings :eek:

[qprdave]

Hello shipmate where have you been, I was beginning to think that the Dabtoe's were getting to you, and you needed some R+R from their feeble rantings :eek:
Naaaaaa.

Mac's an ex-Unwanted. He can take it.

That's one thing about being a good Matelot. If you give it then you have to take it.

[ivorthediver]

Naaaaaa.

Mac's an ex-Unwanted. He can take it.

That's one thing about being a good Matelot. If you give it then you have to take it.


And here is the "living proof"......at least I think its alive ...........I'll prod it with a spanner:(

[harry.gibbon]

Hey up there Ivor...
lukes lik yon dog az bitten a chunk outta yer pennant:D:D:D .. or it cud ave 'appen'd when I flung said rag oer the stern into the washin masheen amongst all that phospherous:p cause when yer stokie boys woz avin ther kye break (usually fer aff our r sow), n jest afour 't ship kruzed ti a alt it mite ave got kawt in't screwz... serves yer rite any road up:)

n az fer not keepin kontrol o yer oilies wee failin te giv em add'quaat eye testin soz ti avoid em maakin basik reedin err'oars:rolleyes: well wot terribil leedership n uz a n'admirible n all:p poor geezers iz goin bout rudderless n leederless it seemz

There now; thats it, one feels much better for that:):);)

Little h

[qprdave]

Hey up there Ivor...
lukes lik yon dog az bitten a chunk outta yer pennant:D:D:D .. or it cud ave 'appen'd when I flung said rag oer the stern into the washin masheen amongst all that phospherous:p cause when yer stokie boys woz avin ther kye break (usually fer aff our r sow), n jest afour 't ship kruzed ti a alt it mite ave got kawt in't screwz... serves yer rite any road up:)

n az fer not keepin kontrol o yer oilies wee failin te giv em add'quaat eye testin soz ti avoid em maakin basik reedin err'oars:rolleyes: well wot terribil leedership n uz a n'admirible n all:p poor geezers iz goin bout rudderless n leederless it seemz

There now; thats it, one feels much better for that:):);)

Little h
Very Succinctly Put Harry!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

[quote=harry.gibbon;55261]Hey up there Ivor...
lukes lik yon dog az bitten a chunk outta yer pennant:D:D:D .. or it cud ave 'appen'd when I flung said rag oer the stern into the washin masheen amongst all that phospherous:p cause when yer stokie boys woz avin ther kye break (usually fer aff our r sow), n jest afour 't ship kruzed ti a alt it mite ave got kawt in't screwz... serves yer rite any road up:)

n az fer not keepin kontrol o yer oilies wee failin te giv em add'quaat eye testin soz ti avoid em maakin basik reedin err'oars:rolleyes: well wot terribil leedership n uz a n'admirible n all:p poor geezers iz goin bout rudderless n leederless it seemz

There now; thats it, one feels much better for that:):);)

I will get my aid to indent for an interpreter so that I may fully understand that local dialect or colloquial gibberish in order that one may respond to that which may pass for the semblance of a local dialect

Whilst attempting to decipher that plethora of innocuous ranting my spellcheck went into innate seizure of vocabulic bastardisation :mad:

[qprdave]

Ivor

If you had ever spent a commission in a small messdeck with Geordies, Brummies, Scousers, Glaswegians and throw in the odd Southern Irishman you would be able to understand every word that Harry has penned

[harry.gibbon]

True enough Dave.... but there was no need for him to get spellcheck to check up on my Ma and Pa;) and because we know spellcheck is never wrong everybody will know now:D:o

How am I gonna face up to penning my next post or thread?? and all because of Ivors' need to have a replacement Pennant (come to think of it - should possibly have been a Pendant though):D

He'll be calling me little and scottish next!!

Little h

[qprdave]

"but there was no need for him to get spellcheck to check up on my Ma and Pa and because we know spellcheck is never wrong everybody will know now"

Hmmmmmmmmmmm

I not exactly 100% sure that Ivor was referring to your legitimacy, Harry

It's just yer actual toffs way of saying that they don't understand proper England like they yoost a did when they woz a children!

[harry.gibbon]

Eeeeeh bloomin eck Dave,
T'was a close call then, cause that Ivor is up to all kind of subterfuge you know;)

He is not owning up to HOW he fettled his fancy new Avatar come Pennant, but I know :D

Also it appears a wee bit noticeable that he is moochin around other threads poss trying to get his stokie boys back onto this thread and regain some creedance because of his failing support;):p

We await the outcome or outpourings in dubious english I expect.

Little h

[qprdave]

Rule No. 1 in the seamanship Manual

"Never trust a diver with a wheelspanner"

[Macadian]

Greetings Thesps I have been a very industrious stoker of late, coping with all sorts of malfunctions here at the happy home, (non of which I might add are me) Such is life in the country...but made easier as a consequence of the self reliance the mob taught me...not to mention that most problems can be solved/alleviated with a length of string, some DUC tape, a hammer and a screwdriver. Well almost everything....:cool:

Hope to catch up with you all soon...more going wrong here just now than the last days of the Undaunted...but that's what retirements for....:D

[qprdave]

Good to see you back Mac.

Ivor has missed you. He seems to think that all the stokers are leaving the sinking ship and he will be left alone to come to the conclusion that Seamen reign supreme!!!!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Good to see you back Mac.

Ivor has missed you. He seems to think that all the stokers are leaving the sinking ship and he will be left alone to come to the conclusion that Seamen reign supreme!!!!!!!!!


Not as long as you have a hole in your "freekle"

There is more chance of you two doing an honest days work.....

[qprdave]

"There is more chance of you two doing an honest days work"

Work??????
Whats that Ivor...I looks like a nasty four letter word that shouldn't be used in this forum!!!!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Greetings Thesps I have been a very industrious stoker of late, coping with all sorts of malfunctions here at the happy home, (non of which I might add are me) Such is life in the country...but made easier as a consequence of the self reliance the mob taught me...not to mention that most problems can be solved/alleviated with a length of string, some DUC tape, a hammer and a screwdriver. Well almost everything....:cool:

Hope to catch up with you all soon...more going wrong here just now than the last days of the Undaunted...but that's what retirements for....:D

Hope all is okay Mac,...and don't worry about me there is only fifty of them to wetnurse...and hold their hands so the Great White don't chew their gash chute's :D

[Macadian]

Hope all is okay Mac,...and don't worry about me there is only fifty of them to wetnurse...and hold their hands so the Great White don't chew their gash chute's :D


Yupper, never seen so many redundant rigging knives and marlin spikes in my life......:cool: The only thing that seems overworked is their 'Station Cards' (continuously being left at the gangway):D

[qprdave]

Mac

I take offence re. overworked station cards. Our Station Cards hardly ever moves from the Quartermaster. Every morning, before the D. P/O comes up and checks the cards, the Quartermaster puts them in the back of the ashore on duty book.

This saves us a lot of hassle. No need to go down to the Reg. Office to see if we can get it back. Also after a good run ashore, we have no inclination whatsoever to take our caps off in front of the Jimmy. He will only stop us going ashore that evening!!!!!!

He might even ask us if we minded returning later to make a social call on the Skipper! where, not only will they stop us going ashore that evening, they will take our hard earned pay from us which will prevent us going ashore the next night as well.

So it is best kept in the safe hands of the Quartermaster in his desk!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Dave,
Well done mate, thats the expanation fair and square;) which only goes to show that Seaman members of Exec Branch not only run the ship, steer the ship, paint the ship, make sure the non-skid strips are down so the oilies don't fall over, and the sparkers make sure in good time ahead of visits that the port is ready for the downstairs stokin rabble to stumble ashore followed by the ships shore patrol which is of course invariable comprised of yer Exec Branch members.;)

All in all it is very important to protect our Station Cards at all costs.

Little h

[Macadian]

Dave,
Well done mate, thats the expanation fair and square;) which only goes to show that Seaman members of Exec Branch not only run the ship, steer the ship, paint the ship, make sure the non-skid strips are down so the oilies don't fall over, and the sparkers make sure in good time ahead of visits that the port is ready for the downstairs stokin rabble to stumble ashore followed by the ships shore patrol which is of course invariable comprised of yer Exec Branch members.;)

All in all it is very important to protect our Station Cards at all costs.

Little h


Mmmmm...Ok ya and stuff...not. As to "the ships shore patrol which is of course invariable comprised of (yer actual) Exec Branch members" bit, I would not get tooooooooooo excited about that shippers. Regulators were generally made up with those who could not cut it within their own original branch, so why would the execs be chosen to 'emulate them' so to speak in the guise of 'shore patrol'? Could it me that us technocrats (Like greenies, stokers, tiffies etc) could not be spared for such mundane and unedifying tasks.....Probably....that and the indisputable fact Execs seemed to fit that particular glove perfectly....:cool:

Hence, Admiral Ivor in despair....http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/OhSht.jpg

[Vegaskip]

Lady and Gentlemen,Stokers and Dabtoes, may I introduce two of my mates... on the left AB. Stan Daround, and on the right ME. Bill Jeratt.
I am trying to dig up some more of my oppos so stay alert ( Britain needs lerts)

47869

Ps I left the badge on Stan's arm blank, you can customise it your self.

[qprdave]

The reason that the Technocrats are not used is that it would be wrong and cruel to pick up said technocrats off the Bar floor and put a "Shore Patrol" armband on them!!!!

[qprdave]

"ME. Bill Jeratt."

I love it.......Never seen such a true likeness of yer typical stoker in my life before!!!!!

Ivor will be so proud to be associated with such a fine figure of Naval Marine Engineers

GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

Oh YESSSS!!! thats got em up and at us:p

Jim, It's the caricature in you thats coming to the fore to which I had already alluded!! nice one!! and so good of you to get the stokie boy Bill looking so realistically true to life, depicting a clearly highly skilled craftsman (no not graftsman)...a BZ goes out to you 'brushstrokes'.

Dave, something's woke em up, to display such a tender nervous disposition:D

Oh and Mac:p I have been wondering as to the whereabouts of those missing Greenies and Tiffs throughout this thread.. Just when are they goin to emerge and lend youz some support?:rolleyes:

and Ivor... oh well he will regain composure (as if) and saunter back from visiting other threads in due course, leaving yet again his 'lads' to fend for themselves for a posting or two yet I expect.

Little h

[Macadian]

"ME. Bill Jeratt."

I love it.......Never seen such a true likeness of yer typical stoker in my life before!!!!!

Ivor will be so proud to be associated with such a fine figure of Naval Marine Engineers

GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love it too...a great talent to be sure, but every picture (and cartoon) can tell a thousand different tales....

So much so the AB is saying to the stoker...can I borrow your wheel spanner oppo...to which the stoker replies...sure you can, but have you done the course....:p

As to accidental dribbling of FFO onto the deck....

Said stoker says....

http://i310.photobucket.com/albums/kk431/macadian/so-sorry.gif

Ever so sincerely and contritely....:D

[oldsalt]

Great sketch, never would have happened in Vanguard, we hard worked engine room gang were inspected before being allowed on the upper, clean gym shoes were required before attempting to walk the pristine, white wood QD. It's all a bit unfair really going on about our appearances, you try sweeping the inside of a funnel & keeping clean.

[NSR]

Who said that stokers didn't form part of the shore patrol - a dastardly lie, sir. I relate the following as proof positive during my promotion to the exalted rank of Acting POSM.

In the initial stages of the Korean war we had to go to Okinawa to refuel and re-ammunition. The American Navy was not allowed to go ashore, rumour had it that they tended to get into fights with the American Army there, so we couldn’t go ashore either. Entertainment was listening to Okinawa AFRS (Armed Forces Radio Station) and each morning at 7am there was a country music programme. About 7.20am the sound of a train could be heard approaching sounding its chime whistle. It gradually became louder as it got nearer until it almost drowned out the music and the announcer, it then faded as the train went off into the distance.

Because of the ban on shore leave, arrangements had been made to have limited access to a swimming beach on a near by island referred to as Tin Can Island. The USN had set up a stand where beer and ice cream were sold. On one occasion I was the PO in charge of the shore patrol on Tin Can Island. A mixed bag of seamen, stokers and a stores assistant made up the patrol. We were transferred to one of the US cruisers and joined a similar mixed bag under the charge of a USN Petty Officer and the combined patrol was taken ashore in a US cutter. The run was very easy as all the swimming parties behaved themselves and we had nothing really to deal with apart from the bright sunshine with very little shade. Chatting with my American opposite number I asked if there were trains on Okinawa and was told that there weren’t any. When I mentioned the 7.20am train on the radio I got a grin and the reply that ‘it was a sound from home to give a bit of a morale boost to the troops stationed there’. I came to the conclusion that I quite liked the way the Yanks did things. I even got to enjoy country music.

Ken

[ivorthediver]

Lady and Gentlemen,Stokers and Dabtoes, may I introduce two of my mates... on the left AB. Stan Daround, and on the right ME. Bill Jeratt.
I am trying to dig up some more of my oppos so stay alert ( Britain needs lerts)

47869

Ps I left the badge on Stan's arm blank, you can customise it your self.

Jim, why has this evidence not been produced before !!!!:mad:

I asked if anyone had seen LH standing around whilst he was supposed to be cleaning the Starboard Anchor cable with wire wool ........and here he is trying to look intelligent and masquerading as a Stoker in front of that Mess Deck pin up ....... I would recognise that lay about anywhere get him below at once..:eek:.....unless you want to join him....Bosun give him a toothbrush to clean that oil off the deck.....Now ! thats an order :mad::mad::mad::mad:

[harry.gibbon]

Now ! thats an order whats this ... something else to be ignored :p cause its been issued by a flag ranking osifer with a big bite out of his pennant! and one who has taken no heed whatsoever to have it patched up:rolleyes:
Continued disregard of such details will surely lead to a replacement pennant being issued post haste ... yep you've got it folks ... a paying oft pennant:eek::D

Ivor, you needs to adopt the humility shown by Mac he left the upper deck in tears ... didn't you see?

I will surely return to the cartoon details of which you appear to have grossly misrepresented nae promulgated even:mad:

Little h

[harry.gibbon]

Ken this posting #200 and a dasterdly lie, sir no no no or in my usual parlance nae nae and thrice times nae... simply a Little terminological inexactitude not worthy of a mention really, just look at our elected 'elite' t'woodn't measure up against their scheme of things!!

Good story that followed though.

Little h

[Bee]

Re: Jim's great caricature at #194...
Dabtoes - surely the AB Stan is only pointing out the shine on the Stoker's shoes - and complimenting him - in the nicest of terms:) (At worst he might be commenting on the danger of having his shoelaces undone :) )
I think it's time you all called a truce....admit it.....upperdeck needs lower deck and vice versa.
and.... with all due respect closest site relative "h" there's nothing wrong with men in overalls...just means they're workers- in the most physical sense of the word.
Cheers,
Bee:)

[Vegaskip]

Bee the shiny shoes are 'Steaming Boots', I made them shiny as a sort of saving grace, they are brand new and a bit tight so the laces are undone.

[Vegaskip]

Ref my posting#194,I recieved an email from Bill Jeratt expressing how proud he was that an illustration of him had been used on such an august site. So proud was he that he attached a picture of his grand daughter(Jenny Raitor)who, he proudly proclaimed had chosen to follow her grandad in to the engineering branch.
I also came across a pic of an old mate of mine from ARK ROYAL days Leading airman Barry Cuda ( I always thought he was a bit of a Fairey myself.)
Ps what do they call Lady stokers , they did'nt have them in my day. Nice answers only please


47945

[Bee]

Germaine???.......Jim....you're too good an artist....that's just plain scary:eek:
Bee

[qprdave]

Another great Pic, Jim. But you are going to have to go some to beat the Bill Jeratt.

[Vegaskip]

Hi Bee Who is Germaine? Did I meet her in Fremantle in '67 if it is , I'm sorry and anyway it was'nt me it was sombody who looks like me.

[Macadian]

Ps what do they call Lady stokers , the did'nt have them in my day. Nice answers only please


47945


Nor mine! Just as well really, I may have been lifting the saftey's more often than not.....and getting to sleep off watch might have been a problem too.....:D Having said that, I believe the use of female sailors on warships came after the demise of steam propelled warships...can't quite picture them somehow on the plates of a type 15 pressurised boiler room....:cool:...punching sprayers on an Admiralty Three drum ....

[Vegaskip]

Oh I do love it when you talk dirty , sorry technical! ( way over my head ) up here on the flight deck.

[qprdave]

"I think it's time you all called a truce....admit it.....upperdeck needs lower deck and vice versa."

Never, Never.

There has been genial ribbing since the first stoker crawled out of his deep dark hole!!!!!!

It is all part of the competition and rivalry that made the Royal Navy. Whether it was between Gunner and T.A.S. rate, Seamen and Stokers, Inter ship and inter service!!!!

We all thrived and still thrive on trying to prove that we were the best.

If you are ever fortunate to go to a ships reunion, It will be there even if they haven't seen each other for 30, 40, 50 years.

I must admit that there are some decent stokers. One, in fact was my best man. But that is as far as I will go. The Stokers on this forum will think that I am weakening and, wrongly, think that they are the best.

[Macadian]

"I think it's time you all called a truce....admit it.....upperdeck needs lower deck and vice versa."

Never, Never.

There has been genial ribbing since the first stoker crawled out of his deep dark hole!!!!!!

It is all part of the competition and rivalry that made the Royal Navy. Whether it was between Gunner and T.A.S. rate, Seamen and Stokers, Inter ship and inter service!!!!

We all thrived and still thrive on trying to prove that we were the best.

If you are ever fortunate to go to a ships reunion, It will be there even if they haven't seen each other for 30, 40, 50 years.

I must admit that there are some decent stokers. One, in fact was my best man. But that is as far as I will go. The Stokers on this forum will think that I am weakening and, wrongly, think that they are the best.

Think??? See, that's the difference young Jedi...we in 'the' branch KNOW we are the best.....:D...no indecisiveness here

[Bee]

Ans. to 209:

Ask your wife Jim.....and no...not Fremantle...I think she resides in the U.K. now...(Although she might have had Aussie origins.) Anyway, 'nuff said.
Bee:)

[Bee]

Ok, ok - let the "ribbing" continue...:)

Bee:)

[Vegaskip]

I'm not asking my wife nuffingk, in fact I'm going to have to put a password on this site.

I think I may have just seen the light .... a Miss Greer?

[Bee]

hmmm:rolleyes:methinks one will have to visit Jim's painting site...to see 'tuther side. This seems to be a flipside world in this thread.....
'bye for now,
Bee:D

[qprdave]

When I joined the Russell, we all flew out to Gibraltar together. When we landed, the Jossman was already waiting for us. He had everyone fall in and did a name check.

There was one guy who had long hair, in fact you couldn't see his ears or his collar.

The Jossman took one look at him and there was a feint smile on his face. He must have thought that he was going to have a great time with this "long haired hippy"

He walked up to him and there they were face to face with only a couple of inches between them. Cleaning it up a bit, he said, "You 'orrible little man. Wot makes you think that you can come onto MY ship with hair down your f***king back."

"Report to my office this afternoon with your 'aircut"

The "Hippy". Looked at him straight into the Jossman's eyes and said..."Excuse me Master at Arms, When you speak to a Chief Petty Officer, would you please do it in private"

"And who the hell are you then, my lad", trying to keep his stature of Master at Arms intact"

I am Chief Petty Officer Ward, Chief Stoker of YOUR little Tug.

The rest of the ship's company just fell about laughing until the Jossman gave us all the look only a Jossman can give!!!!!!

After that, Sharky Ward was the most popular man on board for the commission.

[Bee]

Could be, Jim....now I'm say'n nuthink.
Bee:D

[Bee]

Great story Dave....although I must admit - if my Dad had been in the same situation he probably would have said "'scuse me Miss..." He used to embarrass the heck out me at times...as he disliked long hair styles for males - took him ages to accept it. I remember him once letting a long haired bloke into an elevator before us - saying - "after you Miss." how he survived - I don't know - I can only presume that the guy didn't hear him 'cos his hair was over his ears.
Bee

[Macadian]

Great story Dave....although I must admit - if my Dad had been in the same situation he probably would have said "'scuse me Miss..." He used to embarrass the heck out me at times...as he disliked long hair styles for males - took him ages to accept it. I remember him once letting a long haired bloke into an elevator before us - saying - "after you Miss." how he survived - I don't know - I can only presume that the guy didn't hear him 'cos his hair was over his ears.
Bee

He would be in real trouble in today's Navy I am afraid...as would a few of us....must be a PC minefield that would explode on a few of us 'old salts' methinks. Glad I had left before the many 'odd transitions' came into play :eek:....
PS..perhaps a poor choice of words now I reread...as in 'odd transitions' and 'play'...oh well...not going down the PC route...so there....:cool:

[qprdave]

"odd transitions"

Mac.

Is that when men dress up as women??????

[ivorthediver]

Re: Jim's great caricature at #194...
Dabtoes - surely the AB Stan is only pointing out the shine on the Stoker's shoes - and complimenting him - in the nicest of terms:) (At worst he might be commenting on the danger of having his shoelaces undone :) )
I think it's time you all called a truce....admit it.....upperdeck needs lower deck and vice versa.
and.... with all due respect closest site relative "h" there's nothing wrong with men in overalls...just means they're workers- in the most physical sense of the word.
Cheers,
Bee:)

Well done Bee, I like a women with common sense, and a good judge of character !

I am all for the" truce " but keeping them quite long enough to explain what that entails will be a major problem I feel.

[qprdave]

"I am all for the" truce " but keeping them quite long enough to explain what that entails will be a major problem I feel."

I am all for a truce...As long as we can spend months arguing about it!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

"odd transitions"

Mac.

Is that when men dress up as women??????

or deckstrollers they all seem to smell the same ...a bit like a Knocking shop
cleaner wafting around with their over zealous use of perfume to mask their
macho shortfall

As" Bee" refereed earlier... nothing wrong with [ honest work by] men in overalls :p

[qprdave]

Ivor


Don't knock the knocking shop!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Hi Jim
Don't know what all the fuss is about we have several Wren stokers on this ship :-

Jenny Raitor [seen earlier]
Olive Oyal
Connie Densor
Zepi Raitor [sister]
Maini Switzboord
Eve Vaporater

On our ship when addressing a Wren Stoker we find it best to prefix their name with their rank ....the order requested of them.... and end in please

It works quite well I'm told and the PO Stoker always gets a chocolate biscuit with his Tea served at the station he man's in the Engineering spaces ;)

[Vegaskip]

Ivor Pray tell me how you know what a knocking shop smells like?????

[Vegaskip]

Ive just seen your post above , but it still does'nt tell me the ranks, ME mechanical engineer etc

[qprdave]

It works quite well I'm told and the PO Stoker always gets a chocolate biscuit with his Tea served at the station he man's in the Engineering spaces

In this silly age of PC does a female serve at the station that she womans???

Do they woman a seaboat?????

Do they have Marine engineeresses?

I wonder if they already have a Chief Stokeress

The Mind boggles at Quartermistress and Bosun's Mate!!!!!

I am not going into what they are called in the Seamen Dept.!!!!!!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

I went in one whilst visiting my Auntie in Oswestry........its a village near by

spelt...Knockin

Have you been there to, they do a nice line in "Sticky Buns" if my memory serves me well. :rolleyes:

[qprdave]

Ivor

Suggestion.......

Keep away from the still down in that deep dark hole!!!!!!!!!!!

[Vegaskip]

You have more wriggle than a racing snake

[ivorthediver]

Ive just seen your post above , but it still does'nt tell me the ranks, ME mechanical engineer etc


Not sure of their individual ranks but I heard Chiefy say they were very good at their jobs...I overheard him say they were crack mechanics..and would not be without them

[qprdave]

Nice one Jim!!!!!!

[qprdave]

crack mechanics???

Hmmmmmmmmm

Shut up Dave.........

Ignore this post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[ivorthediver]

crack mechanics???

Hmmmmmmmmm

Shut up Dave.........

Ignore this post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1


See you have now obtained your Captain's rank....will you be going to join your new ship now....?:D

[qprdave]

I have already asked Terry about my Naval Attache Posting

He said that it will be up to kc to make that decision as he (Terry) couldn't afford the stamps!!!!!

[ivorthediver]

I have already asked Terry about my Naval Attache Posting

He said that it will be up to kc to make that decision as he (Terry) couldn't afford the stamps!!!!!


Naval Attache ?....in that case we will have a whip round amongst the stokers....and I am sure the wren stokers will add their four penerth :rolleyes:

[qprdave]

Could do with a Genny Jenny, just incase My Office has a power failure!!!!

[ivorthediver]

Could do with a Genny Jenny, just incase My Office has a power failure!!!!


I'll send you some jump leads................

[qprdave]

I'd rather you sent the Jenny!!!!!!

If you are Diving in the Country that I am in. You can crash out there. (On the British Taxpayers expense, of course!!!!!!)

[qprdave]

By the Way, Ivor....
You haven't asked any easy questions that I can answer for some time. Have you learnt everything Royal Navy now?

[harry.gibbon]

oi oi oi moi's bin missing all day! ... come back in n ad tea, logged on and goodness gracious great balls of fire, if'n the dialog hasn't been and got egged along by the WAFO and that stirrer my site relative the tender Bee... jolly well done ya bowf ... for a while though the cordiality tween dabber and stoker was almost too much, too often, before it soon broke down again into wot it should always be... less cordial more caustic.. then we'll all get along fine. :D

shake hands with the stoker??? ye can't get a grip long enough to shake hands afore yer hand slips out of his .. tis the oily rag always an oily rag!!:rolleyes:

Little h

[ivorthediver]

I'd rather you sent the Jenny!!!!!!

If you are Diving in the Country that I am in. You can crash out there. (On the British Taxpayers expense, of course!!!!!!)


Very Kind offer ,....but I have decided to hang up my fins this year...but I could pop over with Jenny for some snorkeling perhaps :rolleyes:

[qprdave]

Is that what they call it these days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[ivorthediver]

By the Way, Ivor....
You haven't asked any easy questions that I can answer for some time. Have you learnt everything Royal Navy now?


Not If I live to be 100...God forbid....... but seem to be amassing a few very useful reference books at present ...but I am sure there will be loads more Questions Dave.......its just a case of researching what I already have and having read them........ digging deeper to find out more.

Fascinating subject , wonderful characters ,some I could do without...talking of which I can smell sickly aftershave......has L/H come aboard whilst we were talking ?

[qprdave]

"some I could do without"

Obviously you are not talking about me and my good buddy and fellow member of God's gifted few, Little h?????????

[ivorthediver]

"some I could do without"

Obviously you are not talking about me and my good buddy and fellow member of God's gifted few, Little h?????????


Now whats that phrase you use ????????????something about an amendment :rolleyes:

[qprdave]

OKaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[harry.gibbon]

No need of the aftershave us lot eh Dave! we've always just exuded pure sweetness and light;):D

Just realised "de-odour-ant" tis a description of yer aktual greasy overalled type (hard working Huh:eek:) from down below... you know like an ant busying itself by scurrying about, feelers (spanners) waftin about afore them up in the air sensing out the proximity of that elite group of the exec branch members who have checked in with the guardian of Station Cards.... and off ashore for cultural tours and the like!